In The Attic
by Sweet Possum
Summary: Cartman finally finds real live friends that actually listen to him. but unfortunatlly, those friends are felines.
1. Intro

**Teaser Trailer for In The Attack**

South Park, Colorado

Stan and Kyle are playing with toy cars on a sidewalk of South Park, when Cartman comes along. "Hey Stan, hey stupid Jew."

Kyle glared at that remark. "What do you want Cartman?"

"Oh, I was just seeing what you guys were up to. But I would have never guessed. Lover Stan and Jew Rat together, playing toy cars. I never expected THIS to happen."

Stan and Kyle both knew that Cartman was being sarcastic, for he was always making fun or Stan for loving his girlfriend, Wendy, and making fun of Kyle, for being a Jew who's always a goodtooshoes. In the end, he comes to conclusion that Stan and Kyle are both gay for each other, even though they really weren't. He just liked to rip on them.

"Cartman, why are you so mean?" Stan asked.

"Yeah Cartman," Kyle added, "you're a horrible friend, fat boy."

"Ay, do not call me fat!" Cartman replied.

Stan and Kyle both gave an evil grin and together said the one word, "Fatso!"

"Stop it!"

"Cartman really, what are you doing here?" Stan asked.

"I'm totally bored, ya guys."

"Bored of you fat?" He began laughing with his best friend.

Cartman remained glaring, and crossed his arms while he tapped his foot.

"Ok, you can play with us," Stan said, still smiling evilly.

"Yeah, grab a car, fat boy," Kyle said, and began laughing again with Stan.

"You think _I'm_ a horrible friend," said Cartman. "You're the ones who are making up lies about my weight."

Stan and Kyle looked at each other curiously. They still didn't get why Cartman was denying it.

All of a sudden, Stan's dog, Sparky, runs over and starts licking Stan's face. Stan started laughing and pets him.

"Dude, I wish I could have my own pet," said Kyle.

"Why, pets are stupid," said Cartman.

"Cartman, you have a cat and a pig."

"Well yeah, but that doesn't make them cool!"

"Hey, I'm gonna ask my mom if I can have a pet." And he walked off with Stan.

"Fine! I don't need you gaywads!" The fat boy started walking off with a glare.

_Sometimes I have the best time with my friends. But sometimes I feel that we have nothing in common. I think that my friends are all stupid, and I'm the only smart one. And I hate animals. They don't. But I do. What have animals ever done for me? Nothing. Plane nothing. And what have my friends done for me? Nothing. But I like my life. Because life is funny. And if life weren't funny, what's the point._

**End of Teaser Trailer...**

**In The Attack...**

**Coming soon...**


	2. Chapter 1

**I hope you guys liked The Adventures of Stan Marsh and Wendy Testaburger. That was one really special story I'll never forget. But I'm glad I'm finished with it. It was hard to write, and I'm glad to be starting on this new story! **

**Chapter 1**

Cartman kept an angry face his whole walk home. He hated it when his friends acted so stupid, selfish, and mean. He finally got to his house and reached for the doorknob, then looked back with a glare. "Screw those hippies." He opened the door, and walked in.

"Mom, get cooking, I need something to eat," the fat boy said once he closed the door. He walked into the living room, and his eyes grew wide at what he saw. His mother making out with her boyfriend on the sofa. "Mom!"

Ms. Cartman stopped and looked at her son. "Oh, hey Eric."

"Mom, what are you doing?"

"Uh...well...Mike and I were just...umm...discussion...literature."

"Must be Romeo and Juliet! Sick mom!" The fat boy ran out of the room, and up the stairs to his bedroom.

Cartman never admitted it to anybody, but he hated seeing his mom act like that. There was no doubt that he could have found them in bed.

The fat boy went straight to his computer, and went to google images. There, he typed down "Stupid Jew". He bursted out laughing when he saw the picture of Kyle. Cartman, himself but that picture there. "Oh Kyle, if only you knew that you're on the internet." He then typed down "Funny Cats", and saw dozens of them. He started cracking up laughing. _Aw, this makes me feel alive._ He then clicked on one of the cat images, then printed it out.

The fat boy got his notebook, where he wrote and drew horrible pictures of his friends to make him laugh. He always looked at it when he felt upset. On the cover was a picture of Kyle, the same on google, and Cartman put the picture of the cat on a blank page.

"Poopies kins!"

Cartman turned his head when he heard his mother's voice, and shut his note book. He got up from his bed and opened the door. There she was, standing there with a big grin on her face. "What is it, mom?"

"Would you like to have a sleep over at Stan's house tonight?"

Cartman looked down. "Not really."

"Oh. Well, of course you do. I already packed your stuff to go."

"What?! Why, mom?!"

"Because, you're gonna have a wonderful time." She handed her son his bag.

"Oh yeah? What are _you_ gonna do while I'm gone?"

"Uh...taxes?"

"Why?"

"Because that's what mommies do. Now go outside. Mrs. Marsh will be picking you up soon."

Cartman sighed, and walked out of his room, and down the stairs to the door.

**Ok, sorry that was kind of short. But it's only the beginning! Please review!**


	3. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2**

"But mom, Stan has a pet, and Cartman has a pet!" Kyle exclaimed at his parents.

"I'm sorry, Kyle," Sheila replied, "but we just don't have that kind of money right now. Your father gambled again."

"Come on! Why can't I just get one little pet? It won't be _that _much!"

"Kyle, you heard your mother," said Gerald. "No!"

"But it's not fair! You guys aren't fair!"

"Kyle, go to your room!" Sheila exclaimed.

Kyle looked down with a glare, and started to his room.

"And don't come out until Stan's mother is here to pick you up."

Kyle angrily threw himself on the bed and sighed. "Stan has a dog, and Cartman has a pig and cat. It's not fair."

"Kyle, Stan's mother is here!" Sheila called.

The Jew boy got up from his bed, grabbed his bag, and left his room. He went down stairs, and his parents gave him their goodbyes. "Have a good time, boobey," Sheila said.

Kyle walked out the door, and went to the Marsh's car. "Hey Kyle," Mrs. Marsh greeted, as the Jew entered the car.

"Hey," he replied, as he sat down in the back next to Kenny. Stan was in the passenger's seat next to his mother.

"Now we need to go pick up Eric," said Mrs. Marsh.

Cartman sat in front of his house, waiting to be picked up. He didn't really want to go in the first place, but at least he would have something to do, and he could rip on his friends. Cartman then evilly grinned. _Aww...I've got the best prank. When my friends are sleeping, I can pull Stan and Kyle's clothes off, and lay them together only in their underwear! Then...I can take a picture! _"Haha! Those gaywads! Hahahahah!" All of a sudden, the fat boy saw the car pull in. So he got his bag, and headed for the car.

"Hurry up, Cartman!" Kyle exclaimed, as Cartman was getting in.

"Hey, you be patient, you Jew!" Cartman cried as he sat down and closed the door.

Stan, who was in the front seat, sighed and looked back. "Come on, you guys. I wanna have a good time tonight. So that means I don't want any fighting, got it?"

"Yes," Cartman and Kyle said at the time same time.

Stan turned back around. "You guys are acting like sissies."

Kenny started laughing as he pointed to his two friends in the back seat.

"Shut up, Kenny," Cartman demanded.

When they got to the Marsh's house, all four boys rushed into the house after Stan told them that they were gonna have KFC for dinner. "Woe, I wonder what the good smell was in the car," said Cartman.

"Yeah," said Stan, "but Cartman, you better not take the skins off again. If you do, then you will NOT be joining the sleep over."

Cartman crossed his arms. "I'm not gonna take the skins off."

"Good," Kyle replied, "because also, if you do, I'll beat the crap out of you."

"Hey, we'll be watching him," said Kenny.

"Good point, Kenny. We're here to actually see Cartman with the chicken."

"Here you go boys," Mrs. Marsh said, as she sat the bucket of chicken on the table, and walked off.

"Yay!" the four boys cried with excitement, and started digging in, getting their chicken.

"Hey, not too much, Cartman!" Kyle exclaimed.

"Hey," Cartman replied, "you shouldn't be getting too much yourself, Diabetic boy!"

"Shut up you two, and eat your chicken," said Stan.

So they stopped fighting, and started eating. There was a ten second silence, when Kyle broke it. "You guys," he started, "my mom won't let me have a pet."

"I'm not surprised," Cartman replied, "Jewish people don't get pets."

"Yes they do, Cartman!"

"Why not, dude?" Stan asked, ignoring Cartman's remark.

"I guess we're low on money right now. She said we can't afford a pet at this time."

"What? Dude, pets don't cost THAT much. Just adopt one at the pound or something. They don't cost much there."

"They don't count on Jews to take care of abandon animals," Cartman said.

Everyone ignored the remark. "What kind of pet do you want?" Kenny muffled.

"I don't know," the Jew replied. "I just...thought it would be cool to have my own pet, and take care of it. I take good care of Ike. Don't my parents trust me?"

"Of course they trust you, dude," Stan answered. "Maybe you should ask them if you can use your own money. They mat let you."

Kyle smiled. "Hey, that's not a bad idea. Thanks Stan."

"No problem."

"Thanks Stan," Cartman mimicked, "I'm so in love you."

"Shut up, Cartman!" Kyle exclaimed, and pushed him on the floor.

"Ay!"

Kyle quickly took a piece of Cartman's chicken without the fat boy looking, and once he came back up, Kyle acted like he didn't do anything.

"Hey," Cartman started, "what happened? I don't have as much chicken as I thought!"

"It's in your stomach, Cartman," said Kyle.

"Yeah dude," Stan said, "I don't even know how all that food can fit in your fat body." He then laugh with Kyle and Kenny, as Cartman glared.

"Ah!" Cartman cried. "You guys are so stupid!"

"Cartman," Kyle replied, "you can't even spell the word, _chair._ How could you say such a thing?"

"Yeah Cartman," said Stan, "you are such a hypocrite."

"Oh shut up, Stan," Cartman replied. "You can't even kiss your own girlfriend, don't tell me what's not smart."

"Cartman," Kyle started, "you can't even GET a girl! Don't even talk!"

"Oh yeah, Kyle, I don't see YOUR girlfriend. Where is she?"

"I'm..uhh...playing hard to get."

"Kyle doesn't like girls yet, Cartman," said Stan.

"Oh...so that means he hasn't started puberty yet. Well, he is the youngest out of all of us. At least I like girls."

"No you don't, Cartman!" Kyle exclaimed.

Kenny then muffled his own view of girls.

"Oh Kenny, that's sick," said Stan.

"What's sick, is you vomiting on your girlfriend," Cartman said.

"But you don't have a girlfriend, Cartman!" Kyle cried.

"Neither do you!"

"I told you, I'm playing hard to get!"

"Alright, that's enough!" Stan shouted. "I said I didn't want any fighting at this sleepover."

The boys continued eating their meal in peace, not fighting, yet maybe talking about other stuff, like hobbies and other people in their class.

**Ok, sorry that chapter was so short. But I thought that was a good stopping point. Don't worry, the chapters will get longer. I hope you're liking it so far. Please review!**


	4. Chapter 3

**Chapter 3**

After eating the delicious KFC chicken, the four boys settled on the couch to watch some TV. Although there was nothing on, not even Terrance and Phillip.

"Well this is lame," Cartman complained. "What are we suppose to watch now?"

"Any other cartoons?" Kyle asked.

Stan started flipping through the channels, to see if anything was on. He then suddenly gasped on the Fox channel.

"Family Guy!" Kyle exclaimed happily, as Stan smiled with Kenny.

But Cartman just sat there with a glare. "Turn the channel!" he cried.

"No Cartman, we like Family Guy."

"That's not fair! Family Guy is so not cool, and you know I don't like it! Right?"

"Well, we don't care! We wanna watch it, Cartman!"

"Yeah Cartman," said Stan, "you should like it. It's just like you."

"Ay!" the fat boy exclaimed. "That's what Kyle said before! I am not like Family Guy! Turn the channel you retards!"

"No!" all three boys screamed at Cartman.

Cartman was stunned, but even more angry. He then closed his eyes, and started talking in his innocent voice. "Friends watch stuff that they all enjoy. All of us. If one friend doesn't like it, then the others refuse to watch it, and watch something they can all enjoy."

"Shut up, Cartman!" Kyle cried. "We're trying to watch this! If you don't wanna watch it, then leave!"

Cartman stood up. "Maybe I will." The fat boy stomped away into the kitchen. He sat on the table, being bored.

"It's not fair. Those guys are gonna be dead. Dead. I hate those guys. Especially Kyle." Cartman waited for 20 minutes, when he finally heard his friends calling him

"Cartman, do you wanna play video games!"

_Oh brother._ He angrily got up from the table and entered the living room with a glare. "You think I wanna play video games with you guys? After rejecting me like that?"

"Cartman, we didn't reject you!" Kyle exclaimed.

"Yeah dude," said Stan, "we just wanted to watch Family Guy. It was your choice to leave."

"No, you WANTED me to leave! I know you did! That's what you were thinking!"

"No we weren't!" Kyle cried. "But you don't like Family Guy, so it was your choice. Forget about it, and lets play some video games!"

Cartman thought for a moment. "Fine. But I get to choose the game."

So Cartman chose a game, and they boys played for one and a half hours. Pretty soon, after watching a movie, they all got tired and fell asleep. Except for Cartman.

"Finally," he said to himself. "Now it's time for me to do the prank." He got up from the sofa, and headed for his bag that was in the kitchen. He opened it up, and searched for his camera. "Where is it? Where...oh no. That stupid mother. She didn't pack it! Now...I have to go back and get it."

Before he headed for the door, and made one quick look in the living room to see if his friends were still sleeping. They were, so he headed for the door, and left the house.

Since the fat boy didn't have his Big Wheel, he had to walk for 15 minutes to his house. When he got there, he reached for his doorknob, and gasped when he found it locked. "No! Mom?!" He looked through the window. All the lights were off, even the TV was turned off. He wondered what happened, and got really scared. _Did she go away? Did somebody kidnap her?_ He gasped. _I bet it was her boyfriend. I knew he was no good!_

He felt tears coming, but he tried to hold his cry in as he tried his best to open the window, but it was locked, too. So he tried to search for a spare key, but he couldn't find anything. "No!"

"Mewwwww!"

Cartman screamed when he heard that sound. "What is that?! Go away!"

"Meww."

"I said go away, whatever you are!" He tempted to look ahead, and grew terrified once he saw two glowing red eyes. He covered his face. "Go away!"

"Mrewwwww!"

"Ahh!" Cartman found the creature heading for him, and jumping on top of him. "Ahhh!" He stop screaming, and felt something soft. He didn't heard the noise anymore, but a different noise. Purring. He was sitting down, and he found a cat on his lap.

Cartman just sat there for a moment, making no silence as the cat rubbed its face against Cartman's belly. It then climbed up his chest and started rubbing it's face against Cartman's neck. "Ahh!" He stood up. "Get off of me!"

The cat was now on the ground, and stared at Cartman, who was still glaring. The fat boy searched through his bag, and found a flash light. He turned it on, and aimed it at the cat. It was a medium sized cat, gray and white, and green eyes. It's fur wasn't long, just normal length. It continued staring at Cartman, as if it wanted something,

"Go away," Cartman whispered. "Go."

It remained there.

"What do you want from me?! Food? Wait...you want food? You hungry. I'm hungry, too, actually." The cat was still staring at him, so he searched through his bag to see if his mom packed him any snacks.

He luckily found a small bag of cheesy poofs, so he set the flash light down so he could open the bag.

The cat sniffed the flash light a bit, but then looked up at Cartman again, who finally got the bag opened.

He started eating his snack, and then looked at the cat, which was still staring at him, or maybe the bag. He grabbed a couple of cheesy poofs, and set thm on the ground, for the cat to eat. Surprisingly, it did eat Cartman's snack, and looked at him, as if it wanted some more.

So Cartman gave the cat four more, and continued eating as well. "Cheesy poofs are good. Did your owner not feed you or something?"

The cat just went up to him, and started purring, while rubbing it's body against Cartman's legs. Cartman managed to get a grin out, and finally pet the cat. "Well, you're lucky I found you. Or else you would be starving. Cheesy poofs are the best kind of snack."

The cat let out a small meow.

"Ha, maybe I'll call you Cheese Poof. That's perfect for you."

And through out that, Cartman forget all about his prank, and played with the cat for 15 minutes.

Just then, the door to Cartman's house opened, and there stood Mrs. Cartman's boyfriend standing next to her.

The fat boy looked up curiously, and gasped. "Mom, I thought you were kidnaped!"

"Eric? What are you going here?"

Cartman stood up and went over to hug his mother. "I just...missed you. I was so worried you were dead."

"Oh." Mrs. Cartman hugged her son, and kissed him on the head. "I'm ok, Eric. But aren't you suppose to be at Stan's house?"

"Na."

"Oh. Well...ok." Mrs. Cartman waved goodbye to her boyfriend, who left the house.

"Mom, where were you?" Cartman then went in the house with his mother, leaving the cat alone.

The feline, looked at the house curiously, wondering why Cartman had left him. It meowed a bit, and waited for 10 minutes for Cartman to come back out. But he never did, so Cheese Poof left.


	5. Chapter 4

**Chapter 4**

The next morning, Stan, Kyle, and Kenny woke up in surprised. "Where's Cartman?" Kyle asked.

"I don't know," Stan replied. "Maybe he's in the kitchen eating." So he, Kyle, and Kenny went in the kitchen to check.

"He's not here," said Kyle.

"Look, his bag is gone," said Stan.

"Cartman left? But why?"

"Maybe he missed his mommy," Kenny suggested, and burst out laughing with this friends.

"Well," Stan started, "we better get dressed."

"Yeah," said Kyle, "I gotta go home. And maybe...I can try and convince my parents into getting a pet."

"Ok."

So after the boys got dressed, Kyle walked home. "Mom, dad, I'm home," the Jew said as he entered the house.

"Oh hey Kyle," Sheila greeted to her son, as Gerald stood next to her. "How was your sleepover?"

"Good." Kyle headed for the sofa, and sat down to watch some TV. He wasn't sure when to talk to his parents, but he wanted to, soon.

"Kyle," Sheila started, as she and her husband walked over. "We wanted to talk to you about that discussion we had yesterday before you left."

They read Kyle's mind, and he hoped this would be good. So he faced his parents.

"Kyle," Gerald started, "we know you were upset. But...you have a great family and friends..."

"What your father is trying to say, is that you don't need a pet."

"What?!" Kyle exclaimed as he stood up. "No pet?! Are you mad!"

"Kyle!"

"I thought you just said that because of the money!"

"Well Kyle," said Gerald, "we don't really feel for having an animal in the house."

"But...that's not fair! You lied to me! You said just because of the money! I was gonna say maybe at the shelter! They don't cost as much."

"We're sorry, Kyle. But...the answer is no."

"But..."

"No buts."

Kyle felt like killing his parents so badly. They weren't being fair at all. But instead, and stomped out of the house.

The Jew sat on the door step, with his cheeks resting in his hands. _This isn't fair at all._

"Hey Kyle!"

Kyle looked ahead, and saw Stan on his Big Wheel. So the Jew got up and sadly walked up to him with his face looking down. "Hey Stan."

"What's the matter dude?"

Kyle then glared, and clenched his teeth. "My parents will not let me have a pet no matter what."

"Oh. I'm sorry, Kyle."

"It's not fair! Why don't they like animals?!"

"I don't know."

"Well, I think don't they're being fair."

"Well...uhh...why don't you get your Big Wheel."

"No thanks." Kyle walked back to his spot and sat down. "I don't feel like doing anything."

Stan went over and sat down next to his best friend. "Aw..Kyle, it's ok. You can come over and play with Sparky any time you want."

Kyle got up again and walked ahead. "But I want a pet of my own. Onc I can take care of."

Stan got up and walked up to his best friend. He put a hand on his shoulder. "Kyle, you don't need to have a pet because your friends do."

"It's not that. I just felt it would be kind of neat."

"Why don't they want you to have one?"

Kyle turned to Stan. "They just don't like the idea of having a pet in the house."

"Well..maybe their afraid you'll get an elephant again."

"No! I'll get an animal that can fit in the house! And they know what I mean. Why are they like that, Stan?! Why are they so unfair!"

Cartman opened his eyes. He was in his bedroom, which was a mess. He was sweating all over, and he tried to smell his breakfast. But he was shocked when he didn't smell anything. He sat up, wondering what was going on. "Mom?" He got out of his bed, wearing his teddy bear PJ's, and walked out of his bedroom. "Mom?" He walked down the stairs. None of the lights were on.

The fat boy then walked in the kitchen. The lights were off, and there was nothing to eat. "Mom!" He grew scared again. So he ran back up stairs into his bedroom. He lay back on his bed, freaking out. _Where is she? Why did she leave me again?_

Cartman grabbed his Funny notebook, and looked at the pictures he drew. "Haha! Kyle, you stupid Jew." He turned the pages until he got to the last one, where he glued the funny cat at. He then thought for a moment. He got up, got dressed, and left his room.

After Cartman got his jacket and hat on, he opened the door to his house, with a bag of cheesy poofs. "Cheese Poof! Here kitty! Cheese Poof!" He stood there, waiting for his cat friend to show up, but nothing happened. He waited for a whole minute, and still, Cheese Poof never came. So he sat down, and began eating his snack.

After a while, Cartman got up, and decided to go for a ride on his Big Wheel. He rode through the town, when he suddenly saw something in the middle of the road. He put down his breaks, and stopped right in front of kitten. It looked to be about three months, it was orange and white, and it had green eyes. It just stared at him.

This scene seemed so familiar to Cartman, only it was a bigger cat. He remembered that Cheese Poof did the same thing to him. Why was another feline staring at him? "Move kitty, I need to go!"

But the kitten just remained there, just like Cheese Poof did.

"Ok, this isn't funny. I'm not gonna fall for your cuteness. I'm not like that. I NEVER FALL FOR CUTE STUFF. Move!"

The kitten just lay down, putting it's legs underneath it's body, like all cats did, and continued staring at him.

"Fine, I'll just go around you!" So he drove around the kitten, and kept on going, as he rolled his eyes. _Stupid animal._

As Cartman kept riding on his Big Wheel, he saw a familiar figure ahead. "Kenny!"

The poor boy stopped walking, and looked at Cartman.

Cartman drove over to his friend. "You wanna do something, Kenny? I'm really bored."

"Me and you? No."

"Why not?!"

"Because you'll just make fun of me for being poor."

"No I won't."

"Yes you will, Cartman!"

"Hey! Why don't you just go to your cardboard box!"

"See?! You did it again! See ya, fat boy!" He rang off.

"Hey, don't call me fat!"

Kenny ignored him.

"What a buttwhole!"

After a while, Cartman decided to turn home. When he got to his house, he saw that his mother was still not there making him breakfast. "Mom, where are you?! Ahh!" He leaned over and casually looked through the window. He suddenly saw Cheese Poof coming up his drive way.

Cartman happily gasped, and went out the door. "Cheese Poof!"

"Mew!" The cat ran up to Cartman, and started rubbing himself against Cartman's fat body.

Cartman sat down, and happily pet the cat. "Too bad. I don't have any more cheesy poofs. You're too late." Cartman chuckled, and continued petting Cheese Poof.

All of a sudden, a car started pulling in the drive way, causing Cheesy Poof to get scared and run away.

Cartman curiously looked at the car, and stood up with a glare.


	6. Chapter 5

**Chapter 5**

When the car stopped into Cartman's driveway, he saw Mike, Ms. Cartman's boyfriend come out. "Hey there, son," he greeted the fat boy.

_Don't call me son._

"Is your mom home?"

"No, I have no idea where she is." _Now leave._

"Oh. Well...do you have ANY idea?"

"No." Cartman grew even angrier. He hated this guy on his life, for he was making his mom act like a total slut, and disturbed him so much.

Mike went up to the house, and opened the door. "Lets see if we can find her."

Cartman rolled his eyes, and followed Mike. "I told you, she's not here!"

"Oh look, here's a note." Mike began reading out loud. "Dear Eric, Mommy was up late, so I'm still in bed sleeping. I'll make it up to you and take you out for lunch. Love mommy."

"What?!" The fat boy ran upstairs and into his mother's room. There she was, sound asleep in her bed. "Mom, mom, wake up!"

"Hmm...Eric honey, what's wrong?"

Just then, Mike entered the room. "Hey Liane," he greeted.

"Oh." She sat up and looked at her boyfriend. "Nice to see you," she flirted.

"Nice to see you, too." Mike sat down next to his girlfriend, and started acting like a pervert.

"Mom," Cartman started, "where are you taking me for lunch?"

"Oh," she started, "well...where ever you want, Eric. Why don't you get dressed."

"I'm already dressed."

"Oh, well..."

"Forget it, mom." Cartman started exiting the room. "I'll go get something by myself."

So Cartman got back on his Big Wheel, and left, upset that his mother's boyfriend was home, probably making out with him, and possibly doing more then that.

Kyle sat alone again in front of his house. Stan decided to leave Kyle alone, because he was sick and tired of hearing him complain about his parents.

Kyle sighed, when he thought he saw something. "Huh? Hello? Who's there?" He then saw a tiny paw.

Soon, a three month old kitten, orange and white, with green eyes showed up, and ran over to the Jew. "Mew."

Kyle smiled, and reached down to pet it. "Aww..." He then found the kitten jump in his lap, and he started to giggle. "Aww. You're really cute. Where did you come from?"

All of a sudden, Kyle could hear the door open, and the cat left, afraid of the sound. Kyle looked behind and saw his father.

"Kyle, what are you doing out here?"

"Just sitting."

"Oh. Well...it's just about lunch time. Come in to eat."

The Jew sighed, and walked back inside the house.

As Cartman was riding his Big Wheel to Mc Donald's, he saw a familiar face. "Cheese Poof!"

The cat ran up to him, and jumped on his lap, rubbing against Cartman's chest, purring like crazy.

"Aww...is that your cat?"

Cartman looked over and saw a middle-aged woman. "No. He's not mine. He's a stray."

"Well, he seems to like you."

"What do you know, lady?" After the women walked away, offended, Cartman picked up the cat, and put him down. "I'm hungry. And...animals aren't aloud inside. And...you...can't do stuff like this in front of people. It's just not the right way to live." The fat boy got off his Big Wheel, and went into the fast food place.

Cartman got a cheese burger, french fries, and a large milkshake. Plus, a little bag of cookies.

"Where's your mom?" the cashier lady asked.

"She's fine. I have money."

"Ok."

The fat boy gave her the money, and sat down with his food.

"Eric!"

_Oh crap._

"Eric, I knew that was you!"

Cartman turned to Butters, who was now sitting next to him. "What do you want, Butters?"

"That is so cool that you are here. We can eat together, now!"

"No Butters."

"Why not?"

"Because you're a wimp, and nobody likes to sit with you."

"Oh, you seem so lonely, though."

As Butters went on talking, Cartman took a peek out the window, and was shocked when he saw Cheese Poof with another cat. "Hey!" Cartman got up and ran out, leaving Butters confused.

As he got outside, he saw Cheese Poof and the stranger cat sniffing each other.

"What are you doing? Get away from Cheese Poof!"

The cat was full grown like Cheese Poof, and black, with yellow eyes. It looked at Catman curiously, and suddenly went over to him, and started rubbing against his body, then went back to Cheese Poof.

Cartman grew worried, when he could tell that the two felines liked each other. "You can't like each other! Cheese Poof, this cat is black!" But Cheese Poof looked as if he wanted to stay with this cat. It gave him a mew, then went up to him and started purring.

"Eric, what's wrong?" Butters appeared outside, as the cats started running away.

"Nothing Butters."

"Hey, were those cats?"

"No Butters. Just go inside."

"Well...are you coming?"

Cartman sighed. "Fine." _There's nothing else I have left to do._ So he went back inside, and continued eating his lunch, also being annoyed by Butters' talking.


	7. Chapter 6

**Alright, I think I'm getting the idea that people aren't getting the point of this story. Well, I really don't wanna give away hints. This story has only started, and it will get better later on. So don't worry.**

**Ok...this chapter is kind of short..but...I hope you like it! **

**Chapter 6**

Cartman opened his eyes. It was 10:00 pm, and he had pretended to go to sleep until it was his mother's bedtime.

He got up, grabbed a flash light, and left his room. Yes, all the lights were turned off, which meant that his mother was fast asleep, alone, Cartman hoped.

The fat nine year old opened the door, went outside and closed the door. He then turned on his flash light. "Cheese Poof," he whispered. "Hey, come on. Here kitty. Cheese Poof!" He started walking down his drive way, and continued searching for the cat.

He suddenly heard something in the bushes, so he quickly shined the light there. He walked over, and took a peek behind the bushes. Nothing there, which was odd. He kept walking.

"Cheese Poof! It's me! Come out. I need to tell you something. Here kitty, kitty." He was now sitting in the front yard. "Cheese Poof. Here kitty."

"Mew."

Cartman grew anxious when he heard the meow. "Cheese Poof?" He then felt something soft rub against his hand. He shined his light down, and there was Cheese Poof. Cartman stood up. "There you are. Where's your girlfriend?"

Cheese Poof looked behind him, and there was the black cat, staring at them.

"Come over here, black cat," said Cartman.

The cat ran over, and started purring, rubbing it's body against Cartman's legs. "So you're Cheese Poof's girlfriend." The cat then meowed at him, and continued purring.

Cartman looked down at Cheese Poof. "Cheese Poof, do you really want to be with this black cat?"

Cheese Poof meowed, and then walked up to his girlfriend, rubbing it's face against the other's.

Cartman sighed. "You'll always be here, right?" He then found Cheese Poof try to climb up his leg. He grabbed the cat and put him on his feet. The fat boy closed his eyes. "Ok fine. But...if you're gonna be with this black cat, and you're gonna be here all the time, then...this black cat will be here all the time, too. Cheese Poof, you were named after my favorite food. Now your girlfriend can be named after another one of my favorite foods. How about Chocolate. Sugar and salt go good together.

The two cats then walked over to Cartman, and rubbed against his legs. "Alright. Well...I gotta go back in my house. I have school tomorrow." So he turned off the flash light, and went back into his house.

He went sound sleep two minuets after he got in his bed. He was a little relieved that Cheese Poof came back, because he would hate the fact of the cat never coming back.


	8. Chapter 7

**Sorry for the long update. I was on a big writers block. But as I wrote this, I just thought of more cool things to happen in this story! And...if any of you guys have any suggestions, please let me know!**

**Chapter 7**

There was complete silence in the Broflovski's house the next morning. Complete silence. The whole family was at the table with their breakfast, doing their usual thing. Gerald reading the paper, Sheila cleaning up Ike's messy face, who was laughing and playing with his food, and Kyle sat...not eating a thing.

Kyle sat there, waiting and wondering. He was wondering what his parents were thinking, that if they were thinking of his pet idea. And he was waiting for them to say something about the topic. He looked back and forth at his parents, and it was still quite, so quiet that they could hear the ticking of the clock.

"Kyle?"

Kyle grew anxious when he heard his mother's voice, for she could probably starting the pet conversation again. He knew there had to be a solution to it. "Yeah?"

"Why aren't you eating? I thought you liked pancakes with butter and syrup."

_Crap. I really thought she would bring it up._ The Jew sighed. "I'm...I'm just not hungry this morning."

"You have to eat, Kyle," said Gerald.

"Yeah," Sheila continued, "you need energy for the day. It is Monday, the beginning of the week."

Kyle sadly looked down at his food, and finally decided to take a few bites, so his parents wouldn't fuss about him not eating.

Ike started talking his baby talk, saying "Kyle upset."

"I'm not upset, Ike," Kyle replied.

"Kyle, is everything ok?" Sheila asked.

He sighed. "Yes."

"I don't know what there is to be upset about. You have a family that loves you, wonderful friends, you get straight A's, and your healthy."

"I'm not healthy, mom, I've got diabetes."

"Kyle, you're find with your diet."

"Mom, don't you ever want me to do something that I could...be responsible for?"

"You're responsible with your studies," Gerald replied.

That was when Kyle realized his parents WANTED to forget about the pet topic, and move on. "I'm gonna be late for the bus." The Jew got up, grabbed his backpack, and went out the door.

**Bus Stop**

"Kyle, what's wrong?" Stan asked.

"My parents forgot," the Jew replied.

"Forgot what?" Kenny asked.

"What I want. They won't even force themselves to talk about it anymore."

"You mean getting a pet?" Stan asked.

"Yeah."

"Hey guys," Cartman said as he showed up.

"Dude, what took you so long?" Stan asked.

"What do you mean?"

"You're not always here this late."

"Probably eating breakfast," Kenny remarked, and then laughed with Stan.

"Shut up!" Cartman exclaimed. "Hey, what's wrong with the Jew."

"He's upset because his parents won't let him have a pet," Stan answered.

Cartman rolled his eyes, and walked closer to Kyle. "Oh brother, Kyle you have to get over it! Suck up, and get on with your life, man!" At those last words, he gently punched Kyle's shoulder, but he ignored him.

Just then, the bus came, and the four boys got on.

**South Park Elementary**

"And so, every living thing should eat," said Mr. Garrison. "If they don't eat anything, they will starve and die."

"Oh brother."

"Is there a problem, Eric?"

"Yes. Who cares about stupid animals?"

"You do, because you are one," Craig answered for him.

"Shut up, Craig."

"Eric," Mr. Garrison went on, "it's just life. We people need to eat, and animals are just like people."

"But I don't care about animals."

"Cartman, you have pets at home!" Kyle exclaimed.

"So, they're really stupid!"

"That's enough!" Mr. Garrison demanded. "Eric, stop making negative remarks on my teachings. Animals die if they don't get food."

Cartman then suddenly went in shock as Mr. Garrison went on teaching. Cartman went to a flash back of what happened this morning before he went to the bus stop.

_Cartman came out of this house with his backpack, and his two cat friends came up to greet him. He pet them, and talked to them, laughed, and pet them some more._

"_Eric, you're gonna be late for the bus," Ms. Cartman said._

_The fat kid got up, and left, leaving the cats WITHOUT ANY FOOD._

Cartman shook his head, then rose his hand.

"What is it now, Eric?"

"Umm...if...what if an animal doesn't eat for only one morning. Will it die?"

The teacher sighed, rolling his eyes. "No Eric. Some animals can actually go on for a while without food. Like some snakes can actually go on for years without eating, and still live."

"Oh." _Sweet._

All the other students were curious of Cartman changing his attitude toward the discussion.

**Lunch line in cafeteria**

"Cartman, since when do you care about animals' eating habits?" Kyle asked.

"Yeah Cartman," said Stan, "it's like you were concentrating and caring about school."

"I don't give a crap on any of it," Cartman replied, "I was simply making fun of Mr. Garrison's teachings."

"Yeah, Cartman's not responsible."

"Oh shut up, Stan!"

"So Kyle," Stan started, "if you were aloud, what kind of pet would you get?"

"I don't know," Kyle replied.

"Get a bear, so it can rip Cartman's head off," Kenny suggested.

"Ay!" the fat boy cried. "Kenny, don't even talk, you poor piece of scum."

**After school**

Once Cartman got off the bus, he started calling for his cat friends. "Here kitty! Cheese Poof! Chocolate! Here kitty, kitty!"

"Meow!"

He finally saw the two felines running up to him. As they got there, Cheese Poof started rubbing his body against Carman's legs, and Chocolate stood on it's two feet, leaning on the fat boy, and rubbing its face against Cartman's shoulder. "I learned something today," Cartman started. "You don't need food everyday to survive. You can go on for years without eating.

"Eric? Come in the house," Ms. Cartman started as she opened the door.

Cartman started walking in the house. "Get cooking mother, I'm starving!"

**Sorry it was short, but there's still much more to come. Again, if you guys have any ideas, let me know. Review!**


	9. Chapter 8

**Sorry for the long update. I had writers block. But thank you for waiting, and thanks for the reviews from the past!**

**I was practically making this chapter up as I was writing. Sorry it's so short. But the story must continue! Enjoy! **

**Chapter 8**

After Kyle got off the bus at his house, he was shocked at what he saw. It was the orange and white kitten that he had once meant before. It was just laying on its belly in the yard, as if it was its home. "Hey!" Kyle happily exclaimed as he ran over to the kitten. "What are you doing in my yard?" The Jew started to giggle as the feline came up to him, asking for him to pet it.

Kyle sat his backpack down, and began petting the cat. "Are you lost? Where do you live? I don't see a coller on you."

But the cat just suddenly ran away. Kyle was disappointed, and sighed as he walked in his house.

"How was school, Kyle?" Sheila asked her son.

"Fine," he replied, not looking at his mother as he went up stairs to his bedroom. Although his parents wondered why he wasn't communicating.

Once Kyle got to his room, and screamed in shock at what he saw. "Cartman!"

The fat boy sat at the Jew's computer, now looking at his friend. "Hey Kyle."

"What are you doing here?! My mom didn't tell me you would be here."

"That's because she doesn't know." Cartman got off of the chair and walked up to Kyle with an evil grin.

Kyle knew he was up to no good, and crossed his arms. "What's going on, Cartman? What are you doing? Why are you here?!"

"Oh, I just thought that since I never got to do that prank on you..."

"What prank?!"

"Then I would have to make another one."

"What prank?!"

"The prank that I was gonna do last weekend during the sleep over on you guys."

Kyle grew even more angrier. "What?! You were gonna pull a prank on us! Cartman, get out!"

Cartman glared, and walked to the door as Kyle followed. "You're a horrible friend, Cartman!" He slammed the door shut behind him.

"Why don't you check your computer?!" Cartman hissed back.

Kyle sighed and sat on his bed. _What could Cartman possibly do to my computer? _Kyle thought for a moment, knowing that Cartman was smarter than he was in third grade, and he had the advantage to do a lot of things most kids his age couldn't do. So the Jew got up and went to his computer.

He was shocked at what he saw, and gasped.


	10. Chapter 9

**Sorry for the long update. Here's chapter 9!**

**Chapter 9**

On Kyle's computer screen, there were five IM's and messages that were obviously from girls. The first IM said, _I wanna date you_, which made Kyle scared to death. The next one said _Kiss, kiss, I love you, baby! _The next one said _Kyle, you're hott, I wanna date ya! _And there were others that said stuff that just made the Jew wanna hurl.

"What did he do?!" He tried to X out of everything, but more messages just kept coming up. "Ahh!"

Cartman sat in front of his house curiously, watching the two new cats come to his house, along with Cheese Poof and Chocolate. "What do you want from me?!" Cartman screamed. "First Cheese Poof, then Chocolate, and now you guys? What is wrong with this world!"

The cats just meowed, and Cartman sighed. Both of the cats were fully grow and their fur was white. They were apparently related, twins possible. Cartman was getting really annoyed, but even more confused. Why was it that every time he blinked, more cats just kept coming. He already had Cheese Poof and Chocolate, and just recently made friends with the gray and white kitten he once met in the middle of the road. He hadn't named that one yet, and on top of all that, he didn't even name the other two, which he knew now that they were gonna stay. He just didn't get it. Why were these cats bothering him?

"Eric, what's wrong?" Ms. Cartman asked as she walked out of the house. She was then stunned when she saw the four cats. "Eric, did you bring these cats here?"

"No mom! They came here on their own. They won't leave me alone!"

"Well, maybe they like you."

"No Ma, they shouldn't. I don't like them. I hate animals. Especially cats."

"Aww.." Ms. Cartman leaned down and started petting the two white cats. "We should give them names."

"No mom! We shouldn't!"

"But Eric, I know you already made names for those two."

Cartman glared and crossed his arms.

"Lets name them...Snowflake and Tinkerbell."

"Tinkerbell?! We're not keeping them, are we mom?"

"Of course not, Eric. All of these are strays. It's just good to call them by a name. Besides, we already have Mr. Kitty."

"Yeah..."

Every once in a while, Kyle would freak out when he got a message from a girl. _I'll see ya at school, Kyle!_

"What?!" the Jew exclaimed. _Some of these girls are at my school?! _"Ahh!"

"Kyle, what's going on!" Sheila called.

"Nothing!"

"It's almost time for bed."

"I know!"

"Kyle, watch your tone!"

Kyle rolled his eyes, and got off the chair to change. He got his usual PJ's on, and crawled into bed. He lay their silently. He was scared to death. Getting messages by a bunch of girls was horrible.

All of a sudden, Kyle heard a sound, a sound of a new message on his computer, which was still turned on. He didn't look at the screen, and just lay there lifeless. He was so gonna beat the crap out of Cartman.

**Sorry it was so short, but they will get longer. Review!**


	11. Chapter 10

**Chapter 10**

"Meow! Meow! Meoooow!"

"Ahh..." Cartman moaned the next morning. He turned to his clock. _4:00 am?! _"Holy crap!" He fell face down on the bed again, trying to fall asleep. Why was it that he woke up?

"Meow!"

"Ahh!" Cartman grabbed his pillow and put it on top of his head. But he could still hear the annoying sound. He then looked up, and saw the most disgusting thing at his window.

Snowbell and Tinkerbell were on his window sill, meowing like crazy.

"What the..." the fat boy got out from his bed, and walked to his window. "It's 4:00 in the morning! Go away!"

"Meow!"

Cartman sighed, and pulled up his window, as the cats went crazy. "How did you get up hear anyways?"

The two cats, purring, rubbed against Cartman's neck, and suddenly took a jump over his head, onto his bed.

Cartman turned around, shocked and annoyed. He glared, as he walked toward his bed. "Oh no! You are NOT sleeping in my bed! This isn't even your house! Go away!"

But the two cats just lay down on the bed, getting comfortable, ready to sleep.

"This is all Ma's fault. SHE's the one who named you guys. This always happens. Once someday gets named, they think they are accepted to come into their home. Well you stupid animals are NOT accepted into my home. Now get out!"

The cats just yawned, and Cartman suddenly heard a sound, telling him that somebody has signed on. He curiously looked at his computer, and walked over to sit.

On his buddy list, it said _Musicgenious. _It was Kyle. Cartman was curious, so he turned off his away message, and started IM him.

_**EricroxJewssuck: **__what's up jew. What r u doing at 4:04 in the mornin? _The fat boy waited for about seven seconds, and finally got a reply.

_**Musicgenious: **__CARTMANN! What the HE- DID YOU DO?!_

Cartman evilly grinned, knowing what the Jewish boy was talking about, but he tried to act oblivious. He started typing.

_**EricroxJewssuck**_: _what ever do u mean kyle?_

_**Musicgenious: **__You know what I mean fatboy, don't play stupid on me!_

_Wow, Kyle's mad._ The thought of that made Cartman happier than before. He started typing again.

_**EricroxJewssuck: **__well kyle, i'v done a lot of things. where should I start?_

Kyle started growling angrily, glaring at the screen. He hated it when Cartman acted like that toward him.

_**Musicgenious: **__why are there girls on myspace who want to date me?! what did you do? I know it has to do with you pranking me. but how did you did it?! what did u do, fatboy!"_

_**EricroxJewssuck: **__oh, girls are hitting on ya, huh. well of course I did something. Why else would chicks flirt with YOU._

_**Musicgenious: **__cartman, I'm being serious! now cut the crap, and tell me what u did!_

_**EricroxJewssuck: **__kyle kyle kyle. u sound very angry. u need to get some sleep._

_**Musicgenious: **__of course I'm angry! and I can't sleep, because of those stupid girls! what did u do, fat retard!_

_**Ericrox Jewssuck: **__ok kyle, u need to settle down! get your beauty sleep, so u can look good tomorrow for the girls. Bye!_

_**Musicgenious**__: cartman, don't u dare!_

_EricroxJewssuck has signed off_

"Ahh! Cartman, I frickin hate you!" Kyle jumped out of his chair, and jumped back on his bed. He had no idea what he was gonna do. But he certainly didn't want to face those girls. He had to play sick the next morning.

"Hey!" Cartman yelled, as he saw the two cats sleeping on his bed after he signed off his computer. He ran up to them, and pushed the felines off his bed. "Get off!"

"Meow!"

"What is wrong with you?! Get back outside." The fat kid hoped to think that Snowbell and Tinkerbell would go outside. But right after Cartman lay down in his bed, he felt something jump on the bed.

He soon heard purring, and one of the cats walked on top of him, the other went beside his face. Tinkerbell, who was on top of the fat boy's belly, lay down, falling asleep. Snowbell lay down next to Cartman, and purred, giving him one more rub against the face, then falling asleep.

He sighed. "Why won't you guys leave me alone?" He just lay there, listening to the purring of the happy cats. Then he was thinking, his own cat, Mr. Kitty, was so retarded. These cats were actually very calm. What Cartman didn't get, was why were they loving on him? Why would they want to sleep in his bed?

Cartman decided to let it go, and fall asleep.

_Cartman started walking in a dark place. There was nothing around, but him. Soon, Snowbell and Tinkerbell came running toward him. "Hey ya guys, what's up!" He leaned down to pet them, hearing the echoing sounds of the purring. He then found the gray and white kitten coming. He started to pet him._

"_You guys are amazing. Wait a minuet, there's still two missing. Cheese Poof, Chocolate! Where are ya!" The fat boy started wondering off. "Here kitty! Cheese Poof! Chocolate! The color of the background then started to turn red, and he started to panic._

"_Cheese Poof! Where are you! No! Where are you! Please, don't die! Come back! Come back!!"_

Cartman gasped as he woke up, and perked up. "Cheese Poof!"


	12. Chapter 11

**I'm so sorry for the long update! Things have gotten in the way. You know how it is. I hope you like this chapter. And I'm sorry that the whole Kyle thing doesn't seem to get your interest. But you may get the reason for that all later.**

**Chapter 11**

It was 6:00 am, and Cartman got up and opened his window. He looked around, trying to find Cheese Poof and Chocolate. But all he could hear were crickets. He then looked at his bed, and there were Snowbell and Tinkerbell happily sleeping. He sighed.

To him, the dream was telling him that something had happened to Cheese Poof and Chocolate. He was tempted to go out and look. But he was way too tired, and went back to bed, getting his last hour of sleep.

The next morning when Cartman's mom called for her son to get up, the fat boy rushed out of bed, got dressed, and ate his breakfast. He wanted to search for his two cat friends, but breakfast wasn't gonna stop him.

When he was done, he jumped off the chair, and ran outside. "Cheese Poof! Where are you! Here kitty, kitty! Chocolate!"

"Eric?"

The fat boy turned, and saw his mother standing there with his backpack. "Sweety, it's time for you to go to the bus stop."

"But mom, I lost Cheese Poof and Chocolate. I don't know where they are."

"Eric, you can't be late for school."

"But moommm...they're gone. I'm afraid something happened to them."

Ms. Cartman started putting her son's backpack on his back. "Eric, you can look for them when you get back. I'm sure they're fine. Now go on."

Cartman sighed, and left. He hoped that his mother was right. But what if something did happen to them? He called them many times, and they never came. Hopefully when he got home, he would find them.

On the bus to school, Kyle wordily looked out the window. He had no idea how many of those girls on Myspace were from his school, but he knew there would be some. Girls would be flirting and chasing them. And on top of all that, he was still mad at his parents for not letting him have a pet. There was nothing good happening at this time for him.

When the bus stopped at the school, Kyle nervously walked off as Stan gave him a curious look. "Are you ok, dude?" he asked.

"I'm fine," the Jew answered. But he felt like running home when he got in the building. So far no girl gave their attention toward him. He began to grow curious. He would think that the girls would go crazy over him, but nothing happened.

As the Jew went through his locker, he grew terrified, wondering if some crazy girl was staring at his butt. He just stared into his locker, full of a fear. He suddenly turned around, and grew shocked. No girl was staring at him. Everything was just the way it was suppose to be.

_Perhaps it was a dream. Maybe Cartman never did do that prank on me. Maybe no girls will bother me._

"Hey Kyle," Cartman started as he started walking pass him, "has any girls hit on you yet?"

Kyle glared. "Screw you, fat lard!" _It's not a dream! _"Ahh!" Kyle started banging his head against his locker, causing it to shut. He started to growl and clench his fist.

Stan then stood behind his best friend curiously. "You ok, dude?"

Kyle turned around, still glaring. "No, I'm not fine."

"What's wrong? You can tell me."

Kyle gave up keeping it a secret, and sighed. "Cartman did an awful thing to me."

Stan walked closer to his best friend. "What did he do?"

"He...he..."

RING!

"Oh, that's the bell." Stan walked off, carrying his books.

The Jew sighed, and opened his locker again. _What am I gonna do? Things will probably get serious in class._

As Kyle entered the classroom, he grew shocked, for he didn't see any girl look at him. Only Stan did, probably wondering why he was so depressed. The Jew walked to his desk and sat down.

As Mr. Garrison started the lesson, Kyle curiously looked at Cartman, who was now evilly smiling at him. _What did Cartman do?_ Kyle the noticed that Cartman was quietly laughing at him, and pointing at him. Kyle mouthed "shut up" to him.

But the fat boy continued doing it.

Kyle kept a glare, and couldn't handle it anymore. "I'm sorry," he spoke out aloud, as the teacher stopped talking, "but Cartman, would you just cut the crap! I don't know what you did, but so far, no girl has hit on me at all!"

Mr. Garrison was confused, and surprisingly let him continue.

"Just tell me what you did?!"

"Well apparently, Kyle," Cartman started, "the girls have probably gotten over it, the fact that they finally figured out how stupid and annoying, and ugly you are."

"Alright children, settle down," Mr. Garrison said.

"Cartman, you better be right with this, because I don't want to have to deal with all that crap!"

"Kyle!"

"Oh shut up, Kyle!" Cartman exclaimed. "You deserve it!"

"Eric!"

"What are you talking about!" Kyle cried. "I did nothing!"

"Well for SOME reason, you think that I'm a bad person!"

"Children!" Mr. Garrison cried.

"You ARE a bad person," Kyle continued, ignoring the teacher, "and apparently you don't get that, because your mom hasn't told you, because she doesn't get it, because she's a stupid whore!"

"You keep my mom out of this!" Cartman cried.

"That's enough!" Mr. Garrison exclaimed. "Kyle, Eric, to the principles office! Go!"

"What did _I_ do!" Kyle cried. "Cartman's the one who was picking on me!"

"NOW!"

Kyle and Cartman both got up, and left the classroom. After a bit, they waited for the principle to call them in. "Cartman, you are a big bunch of crap," Kyle said.

"No, you are," Cartman replied, "and it's because your mom is..."

"Don't go there, Cartman! You have the most stupidest mom ever! She's a whore, and you know it!"

Principle Victoria finally called them in, and had a talk with the two boys. They told her everything they could, arguing, giving their own sides of the story. Victoria came to conclusion to just give them a warning, and that if they fought again in class, they would get a couple days of detention.

Kyle and Cartman finally left the office, and started walking back to the classroom. "I hate you," Kyle muttered, and walked ahead of him.

Kyle knew he would regret everything he said. Cartman was a horrible person, no doubt of that. But there was still not reason for him to talk to him like that. He knew better. But he just kept on walking. He had a lot on his mind at the time, and didn't want to deal with Cartman's tricks anymore. He was sick of it. In third grade, he, Cartman, Stan, and Kenny were very close. But now, ever since 4th grade started, Cartman seemed to grow apart from them, probably because he has changed a lot on his views and interests. He was much smarter, Kyle didn't want to admit. But he was much worse, doing even worse horrible things before. He didn't feel bad for that fat boy at all.

After school on the bus, Cartman kept complaining to Kenny about his fight with Kyle. Kenny got annoyed, and was tempted to get up, but he didn't want to take that risk, since the bus was moving, and anything could happen.

Cartman got so ticked off every time his friends called his mother a whore. He didn't want to admit it was true. He also didn't want to admit that his mother was always making out with her boyfriend, Luke, and it disgusted the nine year old so much. He had the worse day ever. For some reason, his prank toward Kyle didn't seem to work out well. Kyle didn't get in trouble at all. The first thing he wanted to do, was get home, and look for Cheese Poof and Chocolate.


	13. Chapter 12

**Ok, this chapter may be really short. Sorry about that. But I still hope you like it.**

**Chapter 12**

After school as the kids got on the bus, Kyle angrily took his seat, as freaked out Stan sat next to him. "Are you ok, dude?"

"NO."

Stan backed away an inch, and just turned his ahead away from his best friend, who was sadly looking out the window. _Why won't my parents have a pet?_ That's all he could think about. Sure, Cartman ticked him off, but that's happened many times, and it didn't stay as the worse things too long. He then wondered if the reason he was acting so angry, was because he was angry at his parents. He then thought it wasn't right for him to act like that. He was snapping at his best friend.

The Jewish boy turned to Stan, who looked sad. "Stan...I'm sorry."

He looked at Kyle, and saw his face. He saw that he really was sorry. Stan smiled. "It's ok, Kyle. Nobody's perfect."

Kyle smiled with relieve that he and Stan were good. But the Pet Problem was still wandering in his mind. Would his parents ever let him have a pet?

After Cartman got off the bus at his house, he quickly threw his backpack on the ground, and continues searching for his cat friends. "Cheese Poof! Chocolate! Here kitty!" He decided to search around the house. Surprisingly, he forgot all about snack, and continued searching for the felines.

"Hello?" All of a sudden, Cartman heard a strange sound, but it sounded like cats. So he ran toward the sound. It was coming from the bushes.

He pulled the bushes apart, and just stood there confused. "Cheese Poof...Chocolate...what are you doing?" The sight was so strange to the fat boy, and it soon started to freak him out. "Mom! Mom!"

"What is it, Eric?" Ms. Cartman came running out of the house, and found her son. "How was school, hun?"

"Mom, something's wrong with the cats. What's going on?"

"What are you talking ab..." She stood there, stunned and shocked. "Oh my."

"What is it?"

She stood there, trying to figure out how to explain to her son what was happening.

**I'll give you a hint. It's part of the great circle of life. Review!**


	14. Chapter 13

**Chapter 13**

"Just how people do it," Ms Cartman said. She had already been explaining to Cartman about the cats for ten minuets, and they were sitting at the kitchen table.

"So..." Cartman replied, "what will happen?"

"Oh..nothing Eric."

"Will they die?"

"Oh no. The most possible thing to happen, is for the girl to get pregnant."

"Chocolate is gonna get pregnant?"

"Well...yeah Eric. I mean, if she never got neutered, then there's a 99.8 percent chance that she's gonna have kittens."

_Huh?_ "K...kittens?"

"Uh-huh."

"You mean...MORE? MORE cats?"

"Well...yes Eric. Isn't it great?"

_Great? It's the most horrible thing ever!_ Cartman didn't like the sound of this. So far, five cats were bothering him, and now who knows how many kittens were gonna be born, causing more annoyance toward him. "Mom?"

"Yes Eric?"

"I think we need to do something."

"What's that?"

"I think...we need to kill Chocolate."

Kyle tiredly threw his backpack to the side as he entered the house.

"Hey Kyle, how was your day?" his mom asked.

"Fine." The Jew gave no eye contact toward his mother, and entered the kitchen to get a glass of water.

Sheila grew concerned, for Kyle didn't look the happiest. So she entered the kitchen, finding her son at the table. "Kyle, is everything ok, bubby?"

"Yeah." _Except you won't let me get a pet._

"You look horrible honey. Did you get stressed today?"

"No mom, I'm just tired." Kyle got up, and left his mother in confusion. He quickly ran up to his room, and got on the computer. Perhaps all the horror was over.

He went to myspace, hoping that he wouldn't find any recent messages on females. Kyle's eyes were closed, and his fingers were crossed. He soon opened his eyes, and gasped.

There were twenty messages, obviously from girls only.

"Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!"

"Kyle, what's the problem!" Gerald asked, as he entered his son's room.

But the nine year old didn't reply. He was just frozen, his eyes wide open.

"Kyle? Kyle!" Kyle's father walked up and got his attention. "What's with the screaming?"

"It's...it's...Cartman...is...gonna...pay!"

"Kyle, what is your problem?!"

The Jew turned to his father, who was glaring. "I hate girls! What did Cartman do?!"

"What are you talking about? And what do you mean you hate girls? You...oh no."

"What?"

Gerald kneeled to Kyle's size. "Kyle, are you having thoughts about guys?"

"What...what are you talking about?"

"You said you hate girls. Do you like guys?"

"I hang out with guys all the time, dad! Why wouldn't I like them?!"

"Kyle...what kind of thoughts do you have around your guy friends?"

"I don't know. It's just that girls have coodies!"

"What...you mean...it's not that you're gay?"

"What?! No!"

"Oh...you mean...you haven't started puberty yet."

"Oh dad, please don't say that word." This discussion wasn't getting Kyle anywhere. He was ticked off at Cartman, but if there was any topic he wanted to discuss with his parents, he wanted it to be the pet topic. "I want a pet!"

"What? Kyle, we already explained to you..."

"Stan has his own pet that loves him and plays with him. He takes good care of him. Why can't I do that?"

"Because, Kyle! You have plenty of things to be thankful for! Now stop with the pet thing!"

"No! I won't! Not until you at least let me use my own money to rescue..."

"Kyle...this discussion is over. Don't bring it up anymore!" Gerald finally left, leaving Kyle angry.

"THIS IS NOT FAIR."

Later that evening, Kyle sat outside, depressed. The only thing he could think now, was that he hated his parents so much. All of a sudden, he heard a small sound, and looked ahead.

It was the small orange and white kitten that he knew

Kyle smiled. "Hey." He got up and walked up to the feline, who was purring. The Jew started petting him. "How are you?"

The small cat then jumped on him, and started rubbing itself against Kyle's face. The Jew fell over, and started giggling, having fun with the cat.

But at that second, the cat turned his head, hearing another voice from the distance, and ran away. Kyle just sat their smiling, watching the cat run away. He felt so connected to it. Too bad that it wasn't his.

The orange and white cat kept running, until it stopped, where Cartman was standing. "There you are, Tiger. I was looking for you." Snowbell, Tinkerbell, Cheese Poof, Chocolate, and even Mr. Kitty were also there, by the fat boy's side.

"Alright, lets go to my house."

So the fat boy lead the cats into his house, and up the stairs to the attack. "Ok, good thing my mom didn't catch us."

He closed the door behind him, and faced all the felines. "Alright, I'm glad I have all of you here. I know I have yelled at Snowbell and Tinkerbell. And guys, I apologize to you for that. But it seems that you two can be very quiet in my bed, and if you can do that, then you can do anything I want. So I except you sleeping over. Also, Chocolate, I still don't like the idea of you having kittens, and I wanted to kill you so bad for that. Seriously, there are enough of you. But my mom said no, and I guess...maybe the more the better."

The cats did nothing, but sat there, all purring, looking at the fat boy.

"Ok," Cartman continued, "it seems that the Jew is very, very angry about my prank." He started walking back and forth with his hands folded behind his back. "Which is good, but he got me to the principle's office, which is bad. Thanks to me, Kyle is probably getting tons of Ims and messages from whoever there is. Now, I have no idea why no girls were hitting on him at school, but I do know that they aren't gonna give up, because I am good at telling them how good he is. Maybe they already figured out Kyle was a Jew rat. Or maybe they saw that he was ugly. I have no idea, but I do know that there are tons of other girls who get on myspace besides the girls at school. So I'm not doubting this one bit." Cartman stopped walking, and paused for a few seconds.

"If you guys are always with me, then it must be true that you are listening to me now. If Kyle does something else horrible to me, then I will get him back again. I can't stop what I just did, but I can do more. If Stan does anything bad, I will hurt him. If Kenny does, I will hurt him. If anybody touches me, I will get them back! They never listen to me." He turned to the cats, who were all still staring at him. He was shocked. Could they actually be listening to everything he was saying? This made him feel so alive. He was good at getting the other guys to do what he wanted to do, but he felt so against them and so betrayed at the time.

_I have created my troops. _"I will continue to do my duty." He put his arms in the air. "Come to me, if you are with me!"

All cats came running toward the fat boy, and started their affectionate bonding toward him. Cartman started his evil laugh, as if he were taking over the world.


	15. Chapter 14

**Chapter 14**

"Ok class, looks like Kyle's absent," Mr. Garrison said the next day at school.

"Dude, is he sick?" Stan asked.

"I think he's skipping," Cartman suggested.

"Now, today we're going to do a project. I want you to partner up, and you will each pick an animal to research."

"What's the matter Stan," Cartman started teasing at the boy, who was a little disappointed, "wanted to be partners with your boyfriend, Kyle?"

Stan rolled his eyes, trying to be mature about it. But in his mind, he was beating Cartman to death. He then glared. "You know Cartman, I WAS gonna be partners with you, but since you made that remark, I've changed my mind. He got up and walked over to his girlfriend.

"Hey Wendy?"

Wendy was already with Bebe, but she turned to her boyfriend. "Hey Stan."

"Umm...you wanna be partners?"

"It's because Kyle's not here, right?"

Stan glared. "Look, it's not like we're gay or anything, but..."

"Calm down, Stan. If you WERE gay, I wouldn't be dating you. Bebe, is it ok if I work with Stan?"

"Of course, Wendy. I can find somebody else."

"Thanks Bebe. What do you wanna do for your project?"

"Whatever YOU wanna do?"

Wendy smiled. She loved it that Stan was so caring and sensitive.

"Who wants to be my partner?" Cartman asked. He looked around, but nobody seemed to respond. He glared. _Why is everyone hating on me?_

"I'll be your partner."

_Oh no. I know that voice. _The fat boy turned around, and saw Butters, who was smiling. "No, there has to be somebody else!"

"Everyone else already has partners."

Cartman swore under his breath, and walked over to a desk with Butters.

"What animal do you wanna do, Eric?"

"I don't care."

"Maybe we should do a unicorn."

"There's no such thing as unicorns, Butters."

"Yes there is! I have one!"

"No you don't!"

"You have to see it. Maybe if we work together at my house..."

"No Butters. I don't want to be your partner."

"But you have to. There's nobody else."

"I'd rather work with Kyle." _At least Kyle would be fun to rip on._

"I know you're sad for Kyle, Eric. But we're the only ones left. We have no choice."

Cartman sighed, and threw a piece of paper and pencil toward Butters. "Here. You can write down any information you want about your unicorn. I don't really care about this project anyway. I hate animals. _Except for my cats._

Kyle lay lifelessly on his bed, in his PJ's, sweating all over. He didn't want anyone to think he was a drama king, but all the stress and fear he went through with the worries of females bothering him, caused him to get sick. He slept all day, barely dreaming, let some how managed to get some thoughts in his mind. _I hate girls. I hate Cartman. What did he do? What are the girls gonna do? What if a girl appears to me right now?!_

The Jew finally opened his eyes, and saw a familiar, yet scary face in front of him. He gasped when he saw Bebe's face staring at him.

"Hi Kyle," she kindly said.

"Wh..what are you doing here?" _Get out of here!_

"I heard you were sick, and wanted to see if you were ok."

"You skipped school?"

"No, school's already over."

_Wow, I must have slept all day._

"Anyways, we're partners for an animal project."

"We...we are?" Kyle asked weakly.

"Uh-huh. We can pick any animal we want. How about the wolf. It would be interesting to see how they find a mate."

Kyle started to grow nervous. _Is she hitting on me?_

"By the way, Kyle, why didn't you reply?"

"Huh?"

"My Ims and messages. On myspace. Why didn't you reply?"

_What?! GASP!_

"What do you mean?"

"You said that you wanted to be a babe magnet."

_What?!_

"So I said I wanted to date you, and told you I'd see you at school."

"Wh...you...what about the other girls?"

"Other girls? None of the other girls replied, since they already got a boyfriend. Just me. Must have been other girls from other schools."

_Then why didn't Bebe flirt with me yesterday? _"Why didn't you say something yesterday?"

"I was sick. And now your sick. Isn't that funny? Is that why you haven't been replying? Because you've been sick?"

Kyle started to sweat more than usual, and his heart beat was going faster.

"So...I hope you feel better, ok?"

_I am STILL in danger._

**Sorry for the late update. Anyways, if you're thinking I'm gonna get a lot of Stan and Wendy's part of the story in here, you're wrong. This story isn't mainly about them. It's about Kyle and Cartman, mostly. Review please!**

**Anyways, before I go, and I hope somebody can answer this. It's kind of random, but...**

**I have never seen the whole movie to South Park: Bigger, Longer, and Uncut, and I want to, but can't because of all the F words. It did come on a time at midnight, and all the F words were left uncensored. I don't know why Comedy Central would allow it, but maybe it's because it was midnight, and nobody would be watching at that time. I don't know, but does anybody know if it ever came on with the F words censored or bleeped out? Or is there anyway you can find it online like that?**

**Please, somebody answer that for me. My friends have seen it, but I can't because of..you know how it is. Please somebody reply.**


	16. Chapter 15

**Chapter 15**

The whole time, Kyle thought that all the girls in his class would be hitting on him. But really, it was only one. The rest of the girls were from other schools. But really, just one girl made Kyle sick.

"Don't worry, Kyle," said Bebe, "I know you'll get better. And I know you want to be a babe magnet. But I guess I'm the only one you'll get. It's ok, that way you'll have more time with me." _That way I'll have more time to look at his sweet..._

All of a sudden, the door opened, and in came Stan.

"Stan?" Kyle asked.

"Oh hi," said Bebe. "I guess I'll leave you guys." She started to walk away. "See you at school, Kyle."

"Dude, what happened?" Stan asked, as he walked up to Kyle's bed. "Are you sick?"

Kyle never did have the chance to explain Stan everything. Now would be the time. "Stan, it was Cartman."

"Cartman got you sick?"

"No. He some how used my myspace account, and announced that I wanted to be a babe magnet."

Stan was shocked. "Are you serious?"

"Yeah. Now I'm getting all these messages from a bunch of girls, saying they wanna date me. And Bebe wants to date me. I don't like this one bit."

Stan sat down on Kyle's bed. "Stupid Cartman. Why would he do that?"

"Because he's Cartman! Seriously, he doesn't care about anybody!"

Stan was sure that Kyle was then feeling better on the count on how he was acting. Although, his voice was still weak. "Well...just stay away from Bebe. You ran away from her once. You can do it again."

"I know. But Stan, that was a long time ago! I'm different know. Who knows what I would do."

"Kyle, are you getting better?"

"Why?"

"Cause if you are, you may able to come back to school tomorrow!"

"I know."

"Maybe you should just play sick."

"No Stan. I can't do that. I need to do my school work so I can continue getting A's. I can't fail 4th grade ya know."

"We're only in the middle of 4th grade, Kyle. It's ok to play sick just for..."

"No! I've been absent quite a few times for getting sick for real! Just because of my diabetes! I'm going to school tomorrow."

"Eric, are you sure you wanna do a unicorn?" Butters asked, as he followed the fat boy into his house.

"Hey Eric, how was your day?" Ms. Cartman asked.

"Horrible," Cartman replied, "we have to do this stupid project on any type of animal."

"Oh. Well...why don't you to a project on cats, Eric? You know how much you love cats."

Butters looked at Cartman curiously. "Well, we were gonna do a project on a unicorn," the blond haired kid replied.

"D- it butters, there's no such thing as a unicorn," Cartman replied.

"Then why don't you do a cat," Ms. Cartman said, as she walked away, getting things ready for supper.

"W..well do you wanna do a cat?"

Cartman sighed as he sat down on the sofa. _I hate animals. But...cats...Cheese Poof...Chocolate...Tiger...Snowbell...Tingerbell...and...soon Chocolate's kittens. They're my workers, my slaves...my friends. If I do this for them, they will be proud. But I can't let Butters know about them. It will ruin my reputation. _

The fat boy jumped off the sofa, and faced Butters. "Alright Butters, we can do this project on cats. But let may lay down the rules. I tell you what to do. I will be recording every bit of information, then YOU type it all down on the computer. You will be drawing the pictures, but I tell you exactly what they're suppose to look like. What color to use, etc."

"Oh...ok Eric. Well...what do you want me to do while your recording?"

Cartman turned around, his back facing the kid. "Draw pictures of cats. Five cats. One gray and white. Two of them pure white, one black, and a small orange and white one. Make the black one, though, fat. As if it were..." he turned back to Butters, "pregnant."

"O..ok Eric."

"We are going to make the greatest project ever. It will be better than anyone else's project."

Butters was so stunned. He never knew how interested Cartman could be with school work. But whatever worked for him. Butters loved hanging with his so called friend.

The next morning on the bus, Kyle, who was next to his best friend, remained calm with both of his eyes closed.

"Dude, are you sure you wanna do this?" Stan asked.

"I have to," the Jewish boy replied.

When they got off the bus at school, Kyle didn't make any glances. He just walked in as if nothing happened. And so far, everything seemed to be normal, but it didn't last when Kyle got to his locker.

"Hey Kyle!"

_Oh no. _He turned around, and with no surprise, saw Bebe.

"You're all better." She walked up closer to Kyle, who remained still.

_Stay away from me. _Kyle grew nervous as Bebe came closer. He was in shock, he had no idea what to do. He felt trapped, until somebody interrupted.

"Hey Jew!"

Kyle glared, and turned to see Cartman.

"Looks like you ARE getting with the ladies."

"Shut up, Cartman! I want nothing to do with any girl!"

Bebe gasped.

Cartman chuckled. "As if."

"I'm serious, Cartman! I hate girls! I don't wanna be around any of them! None! No exceptions!"

Cartman just stood there, not saying one word, even though he knew that Bebe started leaving, although he didn't care.

Kyle turned around, and saw her walking away. He gasped. _I...hurt her feelings. _The Jewish boy turned back to Cartman.

"Kyle, do you really care about her?"

"What?!"

"You seem to care." Cartman was grinning.

"No!" Kyle did seem to care, but not because he cared about Bebe, but because he made a person feel bad. He was guilty for that. But he had to let Cartman know that. "I don't care about any girl, Cartman! I don't wanna be with any of them!" He walked up to Cartman, who still remained still.

"You do care, Kyle. You said so on your myspace account."

Kyle grabbed Cartman's caller. "No I didn't! That was you, Cartman! You did all of it! I don't know what your problem is, but stop doing this to me! You are a horrible friend, and a horrible person to everybody! You don't care about anybody but yourself!"

Cartman glared, and pushed Kyle to the ground. "I am NOT a bad person, Kyle. YOU are a horrible person, saying such horrible things in front of girl."

"Ahhh!" Kyle attacked Cartman, and started beating him up.

"Hey! Stop it you two!" Mr. Garrison came over, and pushed them apart from each other. "Here's a stupid question, is there a problem here?"

The two just stood apart, glaring at each other_._

"To the principle's office."

And once again, they got sent to the office, but this time they were in trouble, for Principle Victoria said that if they did something bad again, they would get detention.

And Cartman and Kyle had to stay after school for a whole thirty minutes, which meant they wouldn't be getting on the bus. And of course, Victoria called both of their parents, who weren't happy at all.

After a quiet time in detention after school, Cartman quickly ran out of the classroom.

Kyle angrily got up from his desk, and walked out of the classroom. The only thing left to do was wait for his mom to pick him up. He knew, though, that he was gonna get some flames when it was time for him to get in the car.

The Jewish boy grabbed his backpack, and walked out of the school. He decided to wait outside for his mom. He kept walking, until he saw the fat lard ahead.

He stopped, and hit behind a tree, watching Cartman. He was then shocked at what he saw. He saw Cartman petting and playing with a stray cat, which was black and white. He remembered that cat. It sometimes came to their school, and a lot of the kids begged the teacher to pet it, although he told them to leave it alone.

Kyle was shocked for two reasons. One, because he wasn't aloud to touch the cat, even though Cartman didn't care what people said, so apparently it really wasn't shocking. But the most shocking thing was that...he was petting a cat. He was...playing with it. Having fun with it. Being...nice to it. Kyle couldn't believe it. He never saw so much love come out of that kid. Was he right, that even Cartman had some good in him?

Cartman continued laughing, until his mother's car came in. So he got up, and went into the car, and the car left.

Kyle remained there, and watched the cat, until it walked away. Did he actually see that the cat was happy, too? Kyle didn't understand. Why was Cartman acting like that, when most of the time he was so mean and selfish? Kyle then suddenly felt bad that he told Cartman he didn't care about anyone but himself, and he beat the crud out of him, and now seeing how peaceful. Because the fat lard seemed to care about that cat. Was it true? Did he care about it?

**Ok, just to let you guys know, and I don't want to dissapoint you, but it's better to tell you now then in the future. This is NOT a Kyle/Bebe, ok? Kyle doesn't like her, he just felt bad that he said mean things in front of her, because you know how Kyle is. I'm sorry, I know you guys like them together. But I really don't like them together. Bebe only likes him because of his butt. And Kyle hates girls.**

**Ok, please review!**


	17. Chapter 16

**Sorry for the long update. Anyways, this chapter doesn't have much, but bascially Kyle acts mature in this chapter. Ok...hope you like it!**

**Chapter 16**

"Did you draw the pictures, Butters?"

"Yep."

"Let me see."

The blond-haired boy handed Cartman the picture of the cats.

"Butters, they don't look anything like I imagined."

"Oh, I'm sorry, Eric."

"Whatever. Here, I already got everything written over the cat's behaviors. Now all you need to do is type it up." The fat boy handed Butters the papers.

"Ok Eric!" Butters ran off to a computer in the school library, and Cartman just sat down at a table, being lazy. _Butters knows my secret. He's pretty naive, but I know he knows. I gotta make sure he doesn't tell anybody._ Cartman then looked over at Kyle and Bebe, who were working on their project.

The Jewish boy curiously looked over at Cartman, who quickly gave him the finger with a smile and glare. Surprisingly, Kyle didn't make any comment or face toward him. Cartman wondered why, and Kyle wondered why himself.

Perhaps it was because Kyle didn't know what Cartman was really thinking. How could he make a comment if he didn't know what he was thinking. Ever since he saw him with that cat, things started to seem...questionable.

Kyle faced Bebe, who was working, ignoring Kyle as if she was working on her own. Kyle really hurt her feelings, and he didn't blame her for ignoring him. But this couldn't last forever, could it? He had to apologize.

The little Jewish boy sighed. "Look Bebe, I'm sorry about yesterday. I didn't mean what I said. I was just mad."

The blond-haired girl kept her eyes on the books she was looking at, but she was listening.

"I don't hate girls, Bebe. And I don't hate you. Girls just aren't my thing. I'm not really ready to have a real committed relationship."

Bebe finally looked up at him. "But...is there hope?"

"What do you mean?"

"I mean...hope for us...in the future...you know...when you are ready for a real relationship?"

"Oh...Bebe I don't know. That's a long time from now. I'm not interested in girls. And...I don't hate you...but...even if I was interested in girls...you're not my type."

"Oh..."

"That whole babe magnet thing was all fake. Cartman did it to make me mad."

"I see..."

"So...can we just be happy and work on the project now."

Bebe thought for a moment. She was hurt, but Kyle didn't say anything wrong. "Yeah."

Kyle smiled. "Great." And so he started working with his partner..

Cartman walked over to the computer where Butters was. "Butters, are you almost done?"

"Well...I'm only half way there, Eric."

Cartman paused for a few seconds. "Butters, I need to talk to you."

"Oh.sure Eric, what is it?" the blond-haired kid turned around, facing the fat kid.

"Listen, I know you know about..." Cartman paused, and started to whisper, "my desire for cats. Right?"

"Huh? Oh...oh yeah."

"Well listen to me, can you keep a secret?"

"Oh sure, anything Eric. That's what friends are for, right?"

"Nobody can know about the cats."

"Huh? But why Eric. Cats are pretty cool ya know."

"KNOW THEY'RE NOT. If people think that I like cats, then that makes me uncool."

"Why do you say that?"

"It just does, Butters! Please...just keep this between us, ok?"

Butters sighed. "Ok Eric. I promise I won't tell anybody"


	18. Chapter 17

**Ok, sorry for the long update. You know how it is. Also, I'm trying to get some longer chapters, but they just come short. So...sorry if this chapter may seem short to you.**

**Chapter 17**

Kyle was relieved that things were ok between him and Bebe. But one thing went in his mind. He felt so responsible for being so nice to the girl he hated to be around. He felt like he could do such good things. He wanted his own pet, to take good care of and love. If only his parents would understand.

After the little Jewish boy got off the bus to his house, a familiar figure came running toward him. It was that orange and white kitten he saw a couple times. "Hey," he said as he sat his backpack down, and started petting the feline, who was purring.

Kyle continued petting the cat, when the door to his house opened.

"Kyle!"

His mother's voice started him, but he calmly looked at her, as he stood up, away from the cat.

"Get in the house, and away from it!"

"What?! Why?"

"Because it's a stray. You shouldn't touch stray animals!"

"He's not a stray!"

"Does he belong to anybody?"

"Uhh...n.no..."

"Then he's a stray. Now come in the house."

_Grr..._

Kyle grabbed his backpack, and went into the house, leaving the kitten.

After Cartman got off the bus, he happily started toward his house, ready to smell whatever snack his mom made for him. But he got interrupted by a meow. "Cheese Poof?" He saw Cheese Poof and Chocolate coming his way. They started purring like crazy, rubbing their body's against his legs, then meowing, acting like they wanted something. "What's the matter with you? What do you want?"

"Meow! Meow!"

"Cut the crap!" As much as he enjoyed his cat friends, Eric Cartman was NOT a patient guy. "You're acting as if you're hungry!" _Hungry...oh..._ "Well...Mr. Garrison said..."

"Meow! Meow!"

Cartman thought that animals didn't need to eat a lot. Of course, Mr. Garrison was a dumb teacher. It was probably false knowledge. The fat boy sighed. "Ok, wait out here."

He headed for the door to his house, and reached for the doorknob. _Huh?_ It was locked. Cartman then suddenly heard laughing. So he went up to the window, and curiously looked to see what was going on. He was then shocked when he saw his mother with Luke, her boyfriend.

They were laughing and flirting, and kissing, acting so annoying and disgusting, which Cartman hated to see in his mom. It was actually something any kid would hate to see in their mom.

The fat kid wanted to badly run in there, and yell at his mother. But for some reason, he didn't at the moment. It was as if something was stopping him. He was probably just so angry, sad, and confused all at once. He just fell to the ground with a freaked out look on his face, as the cats happily came up to him, trying to make him happy. Cats were like that. They know when somebody is unhappy.

Cartman didn't know what to do. He felt it would embarrass his mom for coming in like that, although he had no idea why he cared. He really wanted to yell at the top of his lungs. Which...of course...was what he was going to do.

The fat kid angrily stood up, and jumped through the glass of his window, falling to the ground.

Ms. Cartman was in shock as she saw her son.

The nine year old sat up, and looked at his mother with a glare. "Ma, I have had it! You are disgusting! How could you frickin do this in front of me! How could you date somebody so perverted! I hate you, mom! I hate you!" And he stormed out of the room.

The fat boy headed for the attic, as the two cats followed without the two adults noticing.

"I think...I should go talk to my son," Ms. Cartman said to her boyfriend, as she started to get up.

"No," Luke stopped her, "I should talk to him. It's about me. I should be the one talking to him."

Ms. Cartman sat back down. "Alright."

So he got up, and went after Cartman.

The fat boy sat in the attic room with a glare, as the cats still begged for food.

"Eric, knock, knock."

Cartman turned around, and saw Luke standing there. "I think we need to talk."

"Go away."

The adult walked over to the fat kid, and kneeled down. "Your mother loves you. But she can't love just one person. She needs to have more people in her life to love."

"I said go away!"

"Look, I don't want us to have a bad relationship."

"We never had a relationship!"

"Listen, son.."

"Don't call me son! Don't call me anything! Just don't talk to me! And don't talk to my mother! Leave her alone, and leave this house!"

Luke was stunned, and had no idea what to say. The answer was..nothing. So he just got up, and left.

"I have to go," Luke said, as he went to the door.

"So soon?" Ms. Cartman asked.

"Yeah."

"Ok, bye."

And he left.

Cartman stood on the stairs, watching the guy leave. _If he comes back, I'm going to kill him._

**Ok, so I hope you liked that chapter. It wasn't really a happy chapter, was it? Review please, and give me idea if you would like.**


	19. Chapter 18

**Hello everyone! I'm so glad that you're liking my story! Don't forget to vote for my next one. I added a new choice of story called "Back To The Drawing Boy", and it's a south park fic. **

**I have some good ideas for this story I'm writing right now. I'm not sure how much more chapters I have left, but I already know how it's gonna end. So...yeah. Ok, enjoy this chapter!**

**Chapter 18**

It was another quiet dinner with Kyle and his family. The usual, Ike refusing to eat, and Kyle staying silent. He still thought it made no sense that his parents wouldn't let him have a pet. What was wrong with it? They wouldn't even let him have a hamster, and he didn't know why. He also didn't get why his parents didn't even give in some thought about it. It just wasn't fair.

Two weeks have past ever since his problem with Cartman, and Kyle kept silent about the pet issue the whole time. It was time to try again.

"That's it!" Kyle cried as he voluntarily banged his fists on the table. "This isn't fair!"

"Kyle!" his mother exclaimed with a glare on her face.

"You guys have no reason to not let me have a pet."

"Kyle, we said we're off the subject!" Gerald exclaimed.

"I don't care!"

"What what what!" Sheila cried with misbelieve.

"All my friends have a pet!" Kyle jumped off the chair, his back facing his parents.

"Kyle, it's not good for you to be jealous of your friends!"

"I'm not jealous! I just wanna pet! I want to take good care of it! I know I take good care of Ike, and I do my chores all the time. But..now that you see how responsible and mature I am, can't you just think this over?"

His parents were silent, still listening.

Kyle started to calm down now, turning back to his parents."I settled a conflict with a girl at school in a mature way." The Jewish boy walked back to the table, looking up at his parents. "Please...just please think about it. It would mean more to me than anything in the world."

They were silent for a few seconds, and their son kept staring at them, waiting for a reply. "Alright Kyle," Gerald finally replied, "your mother and I will think about what you said, and talk about it."

"But we're not saying yes," Sheila said.

"Or a no."

"So," Kyle replied, "it's a maybe?"

"We'll see," Sheila answered.

Kyle walked away doubtfully. That still wasn't a good enough answer for him. His parents were very strict, and they could just say no after talking about it for a year. The nine year old grew nervous. How long would it take them to talk it over? He hoped for the best.

**At Cartman's house**

DING-DONG!

The fat boy answered the door, revealing Butters, who had his usual cheerful smile on his face. "Hurry Butters! It's almost time."

Cartman and Butters ran into the family room, where Ms. Cartman sat on the sofa with Chocolate, who was in labor. Cheese Poof and Mr. Kitty were both on the floor watching, and Cartman had a camera, ready for God's about to come creatures.

"I think she's about to have them," Ms. Cartman said.

"Oh, this is so exciting!" Butters cheerfully exclaimed. "New Kittens!"

"Shush, Butters," Cartman said, as he turned on the camera. Since Butters was the only person who knew Cartman's secret with the cats, Cartman decided that it would be cool to invite somebody over to share the moment with, even though he didn't like Butters.

"Oh, here they come!" Ms. Cartman exclaimed happily, as Butters gasped, and Cartman started shooting with the camera.

"You got it, Chocolate!" Cartman exclaimed.

After a while, everyone finally heard tiny meowing. Three kittens were born. "Good job, Chocolate," Ms. Cartman said, as she petted her head.

Cheese Poof jumped on the couch, and started licking his mates head, as the black cat started purring.

After days, and the kittens grew all their fur, Cartman started to name them. He was alone in the living room with them. "Ok, since you have lots of colors on your, your name is Sprinkles." He looked at the brown one. "Your name is Sugar," he looked at the black one, "and your name is Frosting. Mmm...sounds yummy. Mom, can you make me some cake with chocolate frosting and sprinkles!"

"We'll see, Eric," his mom called back, "maybe after dinner."

"No, nowwwwwwww!"

"Ok."

The fat boy turned his attention toward the kittens again, and started petting them. "You guys will join my army of cats."

**At Kyle's House**

"Kyle, come down here!" Sheila, who was on the sofa with her husband, called.

Kyle quietly came down the stairs from his room, and into the living room. "What is it?"

"You start," Sheila said to Gerald.

"Ok," Kyle's father replied. "Kyle, you know how your mother and I feel about having an animal in the house."

Kyle looked down to his shoes. "Yeah."

"We never would let you have a hamster," Sheila added, "because we just don't want it in the house. And you also wanted an elephant in the house, which was very irresponsible."

Kyle doubted. This was not going anywhere. It's been days of him to wait, and he already knew what the answer was gonna be. They weren't gonna let him have a pet. After he would hear them give him the final answer, he would probably yell at them, storm out of the room, and curse. He would be angry for a very long time, thinking it wouldn't be fair at all, and he wouldn't speak to his parents for days. But...after a while, the Jewish boy knew that things would get back to normal in life. He had his friends and everything. And even though he wanted a pet so badly, it wouldn't be the end of the world. He sighed.

"Kyle," Gerald broke Kyle's thoughts, "we..."

**Hope you liked the chapter! What will happen? You'll have to wait til the next chapter! Haha! I made you angry didn't I!**

**Please review and let me know what you think.**


	20. Chapter 19

**Hello everyone. Just wanted to let you know that you still have a little more time to vote for my next story. Because once this story is done, the one that gets the most votes is the one I'm gonna write next. So vote before this is over! We're getting to the end! Ok, on with the story!**

**Chapter 18**

"...we've been thinking about what you said," Gerald said, "that you've been very mature and responsible. So..."

"We decided you can have a pet," Sheila finished.

Kyle's mouth dropped. "Really?! You're gonna let me have a pet!"

"Only because we know how you are, and we trust that you can take good care of it and not let it wonder in the house."

"Oh, thank you!" He hugged both of his parents one by one, and started to run off.

"Uh Kyle," Gerald stopped his son.

"Yeah?"

"What kind of pet are you wanting?"

"I don't know yet. I'm gonna think it over."

Sheila decided to give the rules. "No rats, no snakes, and no spiders."

"You can get spiders as pets?"

"No spiders, Kyle," said Gerald, obviously answering Kyle's question.

The nine year old happily ran off to his room, to call Stan and tell him the news.

"So what pet do you think I should get?" Kyle asked on the phone.

"I don't know dude," Stan answered, "whatever your heart desires."

"What would YOU recommend?"

"I don't know...probably a dog. Try the shelter. They have good dogs and even puppies there. And it's the most cheapest."

"I guess so."

"Well, I gotta go. See ya dude."

"Bye." Kyle hung up his phone, and was silent for a few seconds. Pretty soon, he heard some high pitch meowing, so he looked out his window. There was that cat again that seemed to like him. The Jew smiled, and left his room.

As he got outside, he ran over to the kitten, which ran up to him. Kyle started petting him. "Hey little guy. Dude, where are you from?" He sat down, and started petting him some more.

The little feline was purring, rubbing it's body against Kyle's legs, finally jumping on his lap.

"Aww." The little Jewish boy picked it up, and stood, holding the cute thing. He felt so connected to the cat. He really wished he knew where it belonged to. His mother said it was a stray, and...uh-oh. Right now, he wasn't even aloud to touch the thing. But he couldn't resist. He could tell the cat loved him, and he obviously loved it back. "You're so cute."

Kyle suddenly got his attention off the cat, and looked straight ahead, a figure, standing stiff. _C..Cartman?_ What was he doing here?

The fat boy just stood there, at the end of the driveway, giving Kyle one of the most evil glares, as if Kyle did something hurtful to him. _What's wrong? Why is Cartman looking at me like that? What did I do?_ It was so random to the Jewish boy, and he didn't know what to say. He wasn't mad at him anymore, for the whole prank with the girls vanished. Things seemed to be back to normal, and Kyle didn't do anything to Cartman since the last fight a couple weeks ago. So what was wrong? Kyle just stayed silent.

"Tiger!" the fat boy managed to speak. "Come!"

The little cat suddenly jumped out of Kyle's grasp, causing the Jewish boy to fall down on his knees. Tiger ran toward Cartman, and walked away with him.

Kyle was so confused at everything that just happened. Cartman was giving him the most creepy look ever, the cat ran away with the fat boy, and...did Cartman just call him Tiger? _Cartman doesn't have another cat. He only has one. This cat is not Cartman's, is it? _It did run for Cartman. But...why was it so attached to Kyle, then? Kyle is a nice boy, and Cartman is so mean. How could the cat like both different people?

Then Kyle thought of that day after school when he saw Cartman with that stray cat Mr. Garrison told them not to touch. The fat boy seemed so different and respectful when he was with that cat. Was it true, that Cartman was probably a different person with cats? That couldn't be true. Could it? Kyle was so confused, and tried to forget about it, and think about what pet he should get.

He tried to turn back to his house, but then he looked back into the direction Cartman and the kitten ran off to. Kyle felt so connected to that feline, but....what was that glare Cartman gave him?

Cartman entered his attic, where Tiger, Mr. Kitty, Tinker Bell, Snowbell, Cheese Poof, Chocolate, and the new comers, Sugar, Sprinkles, and Frosting, were. "Alright," the fat boy started, "Sugar, Sprinkles, Frosting, this is your first meeting. Welcome. Now it seems that my mom's boyfriend hasn't returned for two weeks, which probably means he respected my athoritah, and he's not coming back. This is a good thing. We don't need mushy stuff in my house. And we don't need another man, right...." Cartman stopped, and sat down, where all the cats just stared at him.

"We...we don't need another man. Right ya guys?"

The cats were silent.

Cartman sighed. "If only I had a dad. But...even though my mom dating a man may get me a dad, I only want..._my_ dad. My birth dad." He tried not to cry, but small tears came. "Don't you agree?"

The cats were still silent.

_Why aren't they answering me?_ Cartman thought that he could talk about anything to the cats, because they respected him. And he could tell them anything. But...they weren't replying. They weren't giving him any answers at all. "Answer me, you guys!"

No answer. They just sat there, purring and meowing, acting like everything was ok.

The fat boy then realized they were no help, and he threw his face in his arms, crying.

**Sorry it was so short. But I hope it was worth it. Umm...I'm sorry to say there is probably only one more chapter left, unless something happens or if you give me anymore ideas.**

**But don't forget to vote for my next story! Review please! **


	21. Chapter 20

**Ok everyone. This is going to be the last chapter of the story. I know. It's so sad. Now I hope this chapter is worth it. I tried my best on making it good, and worked my best at it. So please don't me angry, I'm not perfect. Now, once I get this chapter updated, I will look to see which choice has the most votes, and that will be the next story. I'll let you know at the end of the chapter. Ok, lets get on with it! By the way, in this chapter, it still takes place on the same evening that Cartman stood, glaring at Kyle. So it's the same day.**

**Chapter 20**

After taking a nice walk through the town, Kyle finally saw the pet stop, and interested, walked up to the window, putting his hands on the glass. There were puppies in front of him, and he wondered if one of those puppies would be his.

"Looking for a pet?"

Kyle turned to where the voice was coming from, and saw a man standing there, with a broom. He must have been an employee.

"Yeah," the Jewish boy softly answered, and looked back at the puppies.

"Well, I'm sure we can help you out."

Kyle turned back to the man. "Sorry, I can't get a pet unless my parents approve of it."

"Oh. Alright then."

Kyle sighed, and continued walking. If only his parents were with him. He still didn't really know what kind of pet he wanted. He was really happy that his parents were letting him have a pet, but he didn't know he would come this far so fast. Instead of moping about it, he should be been thinking about what pet he wanted. It was a hard choice. He couldn't have any rodents, and apparently no spiders, since he just learned that people had them as pets. No reptiles, either. There were dogs, cats, fish, and birds in the pet store.

But, Stan did say that the shelter was the cheapest. Maybe adopting an animal would be the best. It was the cheapest, and the animal would be rescued. The little Jewish boy finally decided to go home.

**Cartman's house**

Cartman lay lifeless on the floor of the attic. He was done crying, but he was still upset, and the kittens were already running around, playing, Snowbell and Tinkerbell watched, Chocolate and Cheese Poof were trying to comfort the fat boy, and for some reason, Tiger was pawing and meowing at the door.

All of a sudden, Cartman got startled at the sound of the front door to his house open. He then heard voices, and got up. He curiously opened the attic door, as Tiger anxiously ran out with a grumpy meow. Cartman wondered who it was that came, but his mom sounded so friendly, so it was probably one of his friends, here to bother him again.

The fat boy left the attic, and slowly walked down the stairs, curious of who it was that entered his house. He stopped when he saw who it was. He grew really angry. His mother and Luke were standing there, kissing.

**Kyle's house**

It was 6:00 pm by the time Kyle got home. He was ready to go get a pet, and couldn't wait to go out with his parents. "Mom, dad!"

"What is it, Kyle?" Sheila asked.

"Umm...I'm ready to go get a pet."

"This late?" Gerald asked.

"Kyle, it's about time for supper?" Sheila replied.

"I know," the little Jewish boy said, "but...please...I wanna go now. I think we can go to the shelter. Stan said it's the cheapest. Please..."

There was a five second silence. "Alright," Sheila finally said, "we can go. Gerald, go get Ike."

Kyle smiled, very excited to get his own pet.

**Cartman's house**

Cartman quickly ran back upstairs, and into the attic. "Alright you guys, listen up."

All the cats had their attention on Cartman now.

"We have a problem," the fat boy continued, "Luke has returned. Now...there are two solutions to this. We either have to kill him, or my mother. Now..I can't kill my mother, because I need her to buy stuff for me. So we'll have to kill Luke. Now, here's the idea, and you guys are gonna help me." He started drawing on the chalk board. "First, all of you are gonna go down there, and attack Luke, scratching and biting him, like the evil cats you are. Second, I will get into my mother's car, and run him over after you guys chase him outside. Then, after the half of you are distracting my mom, she will run out, wonder what happened to her boyfriend, and I'll tell her that it was a drunk driver. Now, the three little kittens will be distracting my mom, the rest of you will be attacking Luke. Alright? Or do you need me to go over this one more time."

The cats just stared at him, purring.

"Alright, lets do this."

The Broflovski's drove to the animal shelter, and got out, Kyle first running in. "Wow, he really wants a pet," Gerald said.

"I'll help Kyle," Ike said, as his parents got him out of his car seat.

Kyle was shocked by the time he got in. There were so many dogs and cats, he had no idea which one to choose.

"Well, hello little boy," an employee kindly said. "How can I help you? Are you here to adopt an animal?"

"Yes," Kyle happily answered.

Gerald, Sheila, and Ike finally entered. "Hello," Gerald greeted.

"Hello," said the employee, "my name is Josh. Is your son here to get a pet?"

"Yes," Sheila replied, as Ike squirmed around, trying to break free. She let him go, and the three year old went up to Kyle, looking at the animals.

"What kind of pet does your son want?"

"I don't know. Kyle, have you decided yet?"

Kyle turned to his mother. "No. Not yet."

**Cartman's house**

"Ok," Cartman opened the attic door, "everyone move!"

All the cats started running out, obeying their leader.

Cartman curiously watched them all. Then he noticed something wasn't right. "Wait a minuet." He looked out the door. "Where's Tiger?"

Tiger continued running. He knew where he wanted to go. He finally got to Kyle's house, and looked around, meowing. He then went up to the door, and started scratching on it. "Meow." He went up to the window and looked inside. All of the lights were turned off, which meant that nobody was home.

Tiger walked away from the window, and stood, wondering where the Jewish boy was. He then decided to go around town and search for him. So he did.

**Cartman's house**

Ms. Cartman started to freak out, as the cats attacked Luke, scratching and biting him. "Oh my!" she cried. "Where did they come from?!"

Luke started screaming, as the cats tried their best to hurt him.

"Haha!" Cartman happily cried. "Good job, you guys!"

"Eric?" Ms. Cartman asked, as the cats chased Luke outside, and the fat boy ran downstairs, and followed them.

**Animal Shelter**

As Mr and Mrs. Broflovski talked to the employee, Kyle continued searching for his future pet. "What do you think, Ike?"

Ike started pointing to random dogs and cats. "I like that one, that one, that one, and that one."

"Ike, we can only have one."

"I like all of them, though."

Kyle sighed. "I know, all of them seem so great, I don't know which to choose."

Ike turned around, and pointed. "Orange and white kitty cat."

Kyle turned to where his brother was pointing, and he saw a familiar cat. He gasped, and ran out of the shelter.

"Kyle?" Sheila curiously asked. "Kyle!"

The nine year old ran toward Tiger, and picked him up. "Hey, how did you find me?"

The cat started licking Kyle's face, while purring.

"Aww..."

"Kyle!" Sheila cried, as she ran up to him. "Put that thing down, now!"

"Mom! It's ok, he's nice."

"I told you not to touch it. It's a stray!"

"Listen to your mother Kyle," Gerald said.

"But he really loves me," Kyle continued, "and I love him."

"What what what!" Sheila cried.

Ike curiously walked up to Kyle, and looked up at the cat. "Kitty cat," he said in his baby talk.

Kyle put the cat down, letting Ike show his love toward it. The cat rubbed it's face against Ike's hands, while purring.

Their parents just stood there, watching curiously. They couldn't believe how nice a stray cat could be.

Josh the employee of the animal shelter finally walked up to them. "Aw," he started, "a stray."

"Is it dangerous?" Gerald asked him.

"Doesn't seem like he's mean, but strays can cause Cat Scratch Fever if it scratched or bit anyone."

Sheila started to panic. "Kyle, did that cat scratch or bite you at all?"

"No," Kyle answered, in a tone thinking his mom was crazy.

"What if it belonged to somebody?" Gerald asked Josh.

"Well," Josh started, "I wouldn't think it would run away from it's owner, and show love and affection to somebody it doesn't even know."

Both parents looked back down at their sons, who were loving and enjoying the stray. They seemed happy with him, and the cat seemed happy with them.

"Is it bad to keep a stray as a pet?" Gerald asked.

Kyle grew curious, and looked up at his parents.

"It's not bad," Josh answered, "as long as it gets all of its shots. Take it to the vet. And you have to buy food for it of course."

"We keep it," Ike said.

"Alright," Sheila said, "boys, do you like this cat?"

They both nodded.

"Alright, if we take it to the vet to get its shots, we can keep it."

"Yay!" Ike exclaimed.

"Oh thank you!" Kyle went up to his parents and hugged them. "Thank you so much." He then kneeled down to the orange and white cat. "You're staying with us."

"Meow." The cat suddenly ran off.

"Huh? Hey! Where are you going!" The Jewish boy ran after him.

"Kyle!" Sheila called.

**Cartman's house**

"Ahh! Ahhhhhh!" Luke screamed, as he was laying in the drive way, the cats hurting him terribly.

"That's it!" Cartman called to his cats, and started for the car.

"Where are you going!" Kyle called, as he continued running after that cat. He then stopped curiously, and sat that the feline was going to Cartman's house. He then started to wonder again. _Why Cartman's house?_

"Meowww!"

Cartman gasped and saw the cat coming. "Tiger? Where have you been?" He stepped out of the car, and held the young cat tight. "I was worried. You were suppose to be here to help!"

"Cartman?"

The fat boy turned, and saw his Jewish 'friend' standing right there.

"Cartman, what's going on? Why are those cats hurting that guy? And who are those cats?"

"It's none of your business, Kyle!"

"Dude, why are you making this little cat tag along with you?"

"What are you talking about?" The cat suddenly jumped out of Cartman's arms, and ran toward Kyle, who picked him up. "Hey!" the fat boy cried. "Put him down! Tiger, get out of his grasp!"

Nothing happened, and Kyle just stood there, looking at Cartman curiously.

"Put him down, Kyle!"

"W...why?"

"Because he's not yours! He's mine!"

_What? This is Cartman's cat?_

"Put him down!"

Kyle dropped Tiger, who looked up at him curiously.

"Meow!" one of the cats who were hurting Luke, called.

Cartman gasped. "Ok, we're ready to exterminate!" He ran into the car.

"What?" Kyle asked. "Cartman! What are you doing!"

"Killing the guy!"

"What?! Why!"

"You wouldn't care!" Cartman turned the key.

"Luke!" Ms. Cartman called, as he started outside.

"Mom!" Cartman called, not wanting her to come out.

"Yes I do!" Kyle finally shouted.

Cartman stopped the car, and curiously looked at Kyle.

"I do care, Cartman. Why do you wanna kill him?"

Cartman was shocked. He didn't know that Kyle would care for him. And the weird part, is that Kyle was actually replying to him, unlike what the cats were doing. "Because...he won't stay away from my mom."

Ms. Cartman ran over to Luke, and tried to help him stand.

"What do you mean, Cartman?" Kyle asked. "Guys bother her all the time."

"You're not helping!"

Kyle closed his eyes, and tried to relax. "Cartman, you've been acting so weird lately."

Cartman jumped out of the car, and angrily walked up to Kyle. "Me?! You're the one who's been bothering my cat!"

"Cartman, I didn't know he was yours! I didn't know you got a new cat."

Cartman turned around, glaring, with his arms crossed. "I didn't get a new cat."

Kyle was curious.

"He just came to me."

Kyle looked over at all the cats. _Did all these cats come to him? _"All of them?"

Cartman turned back to Kyle.

"Cartman, I thought you hated animals."

"Who cares what you say! I'm running him over!" He started to head for the car, but he felt Kyle's hand grab his arm. "Ay! Let me go!"

"No! Cartman, why are you so attached to these cats!"

"Because they listen to me!" He kept trying to pull away from Kyle.

"What do you mean they listen to you?!"

"I mean they LISTEN to me, Kyle!"

"And nobody else does?!"

"Exactly!"

Kyle then pushed Cartman to the ground, trying to keep him away from the car, so he could talk to him. "Cartman, we listen to you all the time."

"Not recently."

"What?"

Cartman stood up, and looked at Kyle curiously, wondering why he didn't get what Cartman meant.

"What do you mean?"

"Lets see; you keep saying I'm fat. You won't let me have a choice on what to watch TV. You are constantly yelling at me for some reason. And you don't help me with any of my problems!"

Kyle was shocked. He had no idea that he and his friends were constantly picking on him. Well, he knew that they picked on him, but Cartman picked on them, too. "Cartman..." he didn't now what to say. "You're mean to us, too!"

"Oh, shut up, Kyle! You're more mean!" Cartman turned back around, his arms crossed again.

"Am not!" Kyle was getting sick of this. "Cartman, you know that we all rip on each other. You don't have to come to cats for your problems. We do help you, unless it's something we don't think is right."

Cartman sighed.

"Please Cartman. Just don't kill him, and listen to what I have to say, on how to solve the problem. You don't really want cats in your house all the time do you?"

Cartman turned around. "No...I so don't."

"Ok, then stop forcing them to stay with you, and listen to me."

Cartman couldn't believe what he was about to do. He was gonna listen to him. Kyle was actually trying to help him with his problem. "Ok, what."

"Why don't you just talk to your mom about it? I'm sure she'll understand. You come first in her life."

Cartman thought about it. His mother was so love like and disgusting with Luke, but Cartman was her son, and he did come first in her life. So he accepted Kyle's advice. "Fine."

Gerald, Sheila, and Ike ran up to Ms. Cartman to help her with Luke.

"Cartman," Kyle started, "do you really want to keep this cat?" He was pointing down at Tiger.

"No! I hate that cat!" he cried with a smile. "You can have him."

Kyle smiled, and picked the cat up. "Thanks Cartman."

"No problem." The fat boy turned around.

Kyle couldn't believe it. He was actually having a peaceful time with Cartman. No fighting or anything. Maybe they could actually be friends...

"Hey Kyle?" Cartman turned back to the Jew.

"Yeah?"

"You're gonna need that cat. Not a lot of animals would wanna be with Jews like you."

Kyle glared. "Screw you, Cartman!"

"Well...screw you!"

**THE END**

**I hope you liked the story, and I hope it didn't go so fast. I didn't want it to end with Cartman and Kyle being friends. They're suppose to hate each other. They may have a nice time every now and then, but then it ends with them hating each other. Hope you liked it! Now...the results are in for my next story......**

"**I'm Scared" got 4 votes, "Who Am I?" got 1 vote, and "Back To The Drawing Boy" got 0 votes. You guys need to vote more. LOL. So my next story will be "I'm Scared". Heads up for that!**

**Please review!**


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